In honor of the birth of our Divine Lady of Perpetual Nebbishness, Tina Fey, who turns no age today because she is timeless (also because my mother taught me that if you reveal a lady’s age, they’re legally allowed to hit you in the balls with a pepper mill) and also in honor of 30 Rock‘s season finale last night, here are the ten most quintessential Tina Fey quotes from Tina herself.
“I have a suspicion that the definition of “crazy” in show business is a woman who keeps talking even after no one wants to fuck her anymore.” – Bossypants (2011)
“Tracy took advantage of my white guilt, which is supposed to be used only for good, like overtipping and supporting Barack Obama.” – 30 Rock (2006)
“I want to roll my eyes right now, but the doctor says that if I keep doing it, my ocular muscles might spasm and eject my eyeballs.” – 30 Rock (2011)
“When faced with sexism or ageism or lookism or even really aggressive Buddhism, ask yourself the following question:”Is this person in between me and what do I want to do?” If the answer is no, ignore it and move on. Your energy is better used doing your work and outpacing people that way. Then, when you’re in charge, don’t hire the people who were jerky to you.” – Bossypants (2011)
“If I have learned anything from my Sims family: When a child doesn’t see his father enough he starts to jump up and down, then his mood level will drop until he pees himself.” – 30 Rock (2009)
“There ain’t no party like a Liz Lemon party ’cause a Liz Lemon party is mandatory.” – 30 Rock (2010)
“If you ever start to feel too good about yourself, they have this thing called the Internet, and you can find a lot of people there who don’t like you.” – Golden Globes Acceptance Speech (2009)
“If I could push a button and five people in the world would die, but I’d get free cable for life, I’d do it.” – 30 Rock (2010)
“When faced with sexism or ageism or lookism or even really aggressive Buddhism, ask yourself the following question:”Is this person in between me and what do I want to do?” If the answer is no, ignore it and move on. Your energy is better used doing your work and outpacing people that way. Then, when you’re in charge, don’t hire the people who were jerky to you.” – Bossypants (2011)
“Do your thing and don’t care if they like it.” – Bossypants (2011)
