Remember last summer when Lindsay Lohan got a free limo to drive her wherever she wanted, but was all like, “Nah, I’m a great driver!” And then she rammed her Porsche up a trucker’s ass? Yeah. Well, turns out after the accident, she may or may not have lied to the police, which is kind of a huge no-no, and according to TMZ, this potential probation violation could send her to jail. For those keeping track, we’ve now reached the fourth step in the Lindsay Lohan screw-up cycle: Lindsay Lohan is charged with a crime. Hope you like obsessing over Lindsay’s legal battles as much as I do!
We broke the story … Lohan told cops she was NOT behind the wheel of her Porsche when it slammed into the back of an 18-wheeler. Fact is she was — according to multiple witnesses. Law enforcement sources tell us … the case will be filed as a misdemeanor by the Santa Monica City Attorney … possibly this week. The charge could spell huge trouble for Lindsay, because she’s currently on probation for the jewelry heist. The criminal filing could trigger a probation violation, and Judge Stephanie Sautner — the jewelry judge — could send her to the slammer for a long, long time.
You know, the more I think about it, the more I realize this situation is pretty much the perfect metaphorical representation of Lindsay’s entire life: She was given an opportunity she absolutely didn’t deserve, was offered a chauffeured limousine to take her wherever she needed to go, and she still found a way to completely screw it up and land herself in enough trouble to potentially send her to jail. The only way this metaphor could be any more perfect is if Dina Lohan was in the passenger seat with a bottle of vodka.