Kim Kardashian’s marriage was technically real!

Kim Kardashian and Kris Humphries

Because you should always trust people who are paid to tell you what someone wants you to think, Kim Kardashian‘s lawyer wants you all to know that Kim’s marriage to Kris Humphries was real and that she didn’t do the entire thing for money and attention like everyone knows she did! No, she actually did it because she had that feeling in her heart that you humans call ‘love’. Or that might have just been a nasty case of gas. Who knows? Anyone’s call at this point. TMZ reports:

Wasser — who is notorious for not speaking publicly about her cases — tells us the negotiations were “prolonged” and dealt with financial issues “that go well into the future” — markers that would not be present if someone intended a short marriage from the get go. Sources connected with Kim tell us … the prenup covered Kim’s long-range career plans … as one source put it, “Why on earth would they [Kim, Kris and their lawyers] create a document which looks far into the future if they planned a marriage that would only last a few months.” And the same sources tell us the prenup was exhaustive — 30 pages, including exhibits, tax returns and other financial documents.

Okay, so yes, we will cede that the marriage was “real” in the strict legal sense that they both signed a marriage certificate, but the ability to sign your own name on paper doesn’t mean you’re actually in love. I could sign my own name back in kindergarten (albeit, in giant backwards letters), but that doesn’t mean I could get married because marriage is something you do when you’re in love with someone. You know, instead of something you do because earning $18 Million on your own is hard.

Kim Kardashian and Kris Humphries

About JEREMY FEIST 4832 Articles
Jeremy Feist is an (ahem) entertainer from Toronto, Canada. He writes, acts, and performs on stage, and has been a writer for Popbytes for almost three years now. He lives in Toronto with his boyfriend, his incredibly dumb but cute puppy, and his immortal cat.