Kim Kardashian and Kris Humphries are divorcing!

Kim Kardashian and Kris Humphries

Hey, remember all those times I joked about how it was only a matter of time before we were all watching Kim’s Fairytale Divorce because Kim Kardashian faked love and sold out her marriage for attention and money because she is literally the most terrible human being in pop culture? Well HA! I was right. Only 72 days after she got fake-married-for-the-publicity, she and Kris Humphries are divorcing and citing irreconcilable differences, which I’m just going to assume means “Kris realized he was stuck with Kim for the rest of his life.” TMZ reports:

We’re told even though the marriage was short, she will not seek an annulment. It’s a garden variety divorce, in which Kim Kardashian cites “irreconcilable differences.” We’re told the date of separation is listed as today, October 31st, 2011. Kim has hired disso-queen Laura Wasser, who has repped the likes of Britney Spears, Maria Shriver, Angelina Jolie, Ryan Reynolds, and Robyn Gibson, Mel’s almost ex-wife. As we first reported, the couple has a prenuptial agreement … Kim made sure of that. Rumors of a split had been swirling for some time and the two were spotted out to dinner earlier this week … looking less than pleased with one another.

Normally, I would question if my reveling in another person’s divorce made me a bad person, and then I realized that Kim and Kris made millions of dollars off their fake wedding and that Kim is a miserable human being, and I’m not even sure if the “human being” part applies to her. So screw you and your willingness to fake genuine love for fame Kim, you despicable, contemptible harpy bitch. I’d say I hope you die alone, but God knows it’s going to happen either way at this point.

Kim Kardashian and Kris Humphries

About JEREMY FEIST 4970 Articles
Jeremy Feist is an (ahem) entertainer from Toronto, Canada. He writes, acts, and performs on stage, and has been a writer for Popbytes for almost three years now. He lives in Toronto with his boyfriend, his incredibly dumb but cute puppy, and his immortal cat.