It really shouldn’t surprise you that the cast of Jersey Shore might not be the most stable people, mostly because getting a bunch of previously violent alcoholic drug-addicts, giving them a never-ending supply of booze, sex and money and then putting them in front of a camera only leads to whore-punching and latent homosexual tendencies clumsily masked in gay panic. Anyway, it turns out Jenni ‘JWoww’ Farley, the tangelo whore with the huge tits, might have stabbed her boyfriend through the fucking arm with a knife because she didn’t drink enough to suppress the voices in her head. Or she was too drunk to suppress them. One or the other.
“Jenni put a kitchen knife through my entire arm,” Tom Lippolis tells Star magazine, which hits the stands nationally Friday. “I thought she was going to kill me.” Lippolis caught the March 2010 attack on video, now available exclusively on RadarOnline. Lippolis, who at the time was also JWoww’s manager, didn’t report the domestic violence to police. He told Star the booze-fueled row started over Lippolis posing for a photo with another woman. SOURCE
This makes sense. And when you consider that for the next season of Jersey Shore, the only place she can drink is in the house with the others. Which means it’s really only a matter of time before she snaps and starts going Michael Meyers on the rest of the cast. “Where the fuck is the duckphone?! AND WHY CAN’T I DRINK?! *Revs chainsaw* EVERYBODY’S GONNA FUCKING DIE!!!”