Somehow Jessica Simpson (against all the odds, including being a dummy) has managed to make herself a cool billion dollars by hawking clothing, hats, bags, and shoes (who else even knows what else she’s put her name on these days). She’s being featured in the latest issue of New York magazine in an article called The $1 Billion Girl. It’s a good thing Jessica figured how to make herself some cash, she certainly wasn’t going to make it from her barely there music career or rely on her fiancé Eric Johnson! (I still wonder if those two will actually make it down the aisle?) Plus Jess managed to snag herself an amazing cover shot, I love the oversized wig, this is the best thing she’s done in years! (Her legs aren’t that small though, right? We’ll just let that slide!) I still don’t know who out there is buying up her (obviously expensive) fashion goods, but some of you must be (come on, just admit it), helping her to amass quite a fortune for a talentless fool. (I bet dad Joe Simpson has plenty of investment plans in the works before his well dries up) She’s such an easy target but I do generally like her, I still feel awful about her dog Daisy getting snatched by a coyote, so I try not to make fun of her too much!