I have to admit, when I heard the words “Christina Hendricks in Playboy“, I was… I was expecting something a little more. Apparently the picture was from over ten years ago, and if this doesn’t prove beyond a shadow of a doubt that Playboy is just fucking awful, the image of the usually gorgeous Hendricks turned into some blond slutbot should do it for you. What’s wrong with it? Let’s take a look.
#1: FUCKING. CLOWNS. These things should be illegal, I think we can all agree on that. And apparently, this one decided to wear a wig made entirely out of Star Jones‘ pubes.
#2: Why is this Slim Jim wearing a speedo? That is one sexy, sexy piece of beef jerky. Seriously, he looks like what would happen if you marinated Jason Adonis in soy sauce.
#3: And now for the girls… Adorable! Three Little Maids from school are we… From the deepest, most perverse region of Hugh Hefner‘s mind. Man, that guy ruins everything.
#4: Look, I appreciate the fact that Christina is a naturally pale woman, but… No. Just no. This borders on albino. Which would actually explain a lot about Hef’s stable of whores.
#5: No surprise, they’re all wearing blond wigs. Man, Hugh Hefner is going to be popping a huuuuuuge boner just as soon as he takes his Viagra, Cialis and Triple Mix.
