Crystal Harris keeps on digging for gold!

After seeing Holly Madison rake in money and attention by insuring her $2 boobs for $1 Million (truly a sound investment, if you’re trying to lose all your money) Crystal Harris has decided to hop onto the selling out tacky useless shit bandwagon by hawking the engagement ring Hugh Hefner gave her to let him slap his wrinkled penis against her forehead. Picture it … aaaaaaaaand you know what hell is like. Via TMZ:

A diamond isn’t always forever … sometimes its only for 6 months — especially for Hugh Hefner’s ex-fiancee Crystal Harris … who just put her engagement ring on a pretty famous auction block! TMZ has learned … the platinum ring, which boasts a 3.39 carat circular-cut diamond — will be auctioned off by Christie’s in NYC next month. According to the listing, the ring is expected to sell somewhere in the range of $20 -$30k.

See? Truly a happy ending for everyone involved. Hugh avoided being smothered to death in his sleep by a gold-digging skank for his money, and Crystal got a nice little windfall by faking love. It’s like my mom always says, when life gives you lemons, you break-up with life just a few days before your wedding, trash them in the tabloids, then pawn the lemons off on eBay for mucho dinero.

Crystal Harris

About JEREMY FEIST 4970 Articles
Jeremy Feist is an (ahem) entertainer from Toronto, Canada. He writes, acts, and performs on stage, and has been a writer for Popbytes for almost three years now. He lives in Toronto with his boyfriend, his incredibly dumb but cute puppy, and his immortal cat.