Angelina Pivarnick’s baby doesn’t belong to Dave Kovacs?

Angelina Pivarnick and Dave Kovacs

Though I’m loathe to give Angelina Pivarnick, somehow the worst person to ever grace the syphilis-infected celluloid of Jersey Shore, more attention, there’s been a big twist in her pregnancy: It turns out she got pregnant after she cheated on her fiance Dave Kovacs … oh, wait, sorry, make that ex-fiance now. Because you know, nothing sours a potential marriage like cheating on your partner and then getting pregnant.

“I’m going through a really tough time right now,” he said in an exclusive interview. “I have ended things with Angelina.” He claimed that he went through her phone and saw texts from multiple guys. “I got a text from a fire fighter who actually apologized for sleeping with Angelina saying he just found out she was engaged.” SOURCE

Whoa whoa whoa … wait two seconds here. A firefighter? A FIREFIGHTER?! Look, cheating on your spouse is an unforgivable act, but come on; how do you say no to a firefighter who wants to give you some of that bidness? I mean, a muscular man who saves people from burning buildings and knows how to handle a fire hose? Jesus, my legs just sprang open typing that. Angelina may be a filthy whore, but if I had a boyfriend and he cheated on me with a firefighter, I wouldn’t really mind. “Oh, you’re going out to get railed by a firefighter? Here’s a condom and some lube. And just to be safe, here’s a flavored condom. Remember: just because it’s flavored, doesn’t mean it’s edible. Learned that the hard way.”

Angelina Pivarnick and Dave Kovacs

About JEREMY FEIST 4832 Articles
Jeremy Feist is an (ahem) entertainer from Toronto, Canada. He writes, acts, and performs on stage, and has been a writer for Popbytes for almost three years now. He lives in Toronto with his boyfriend, his incredibly dumb but cute puppy, and his immortal cat.