Tom Cruise: Spanked by a drag queen at Matt Damon’s b-day party?

Tom Cruise, strapping heterosexual man who loves women as much as he loves being 6’4 and not having sex with dudes, went to Matt Damon‘s birthday party the other night, where he was spanked by a drag queen. But it totally wasn’t, like, weird or anything. Just one dude in a dress spanking another dude. On the butt. HAHA! Straight people bein’ straight! Page Six reports …

om Cruise and Matt Damon got spankings Saturday night at a naughty birthday bash for Damon. Cruise was spotted at Simon Hammerstein’s London club The Box to toast Damon’s 42nd birthday, along with The Avengers hunk Chris Hemsworth, Emily Blunt, Bill Paxton and party organizer John Krasinski. “Tom arrived solo,” said a spy, who added that the Hollywood heavyweights all “got paddled on their rears” by the club’s cross-dressing hostess. “Matt got some extra spanking” for being the birthday boy, and, “they all had a fantastic night enjoying the shows and partying till the end.” Hammerstein, meanwhile, is prepping his latest performance-based club, The Act, which opens in Las Vegas on Oct. 25.

Oh, wait, Chris Hemsworth got paddled too? I’ll be in my bunk. Oh don’t you judge me, that’s Thor we’re talking about. Like you wouldn’t with Thor.

Tom Cruise

Jeremy Feist About Jeremy Feist

Jeremy Feist is an (ahem) entertainer from Toronto, Canada. He writes, acts, and performs on stage, and has been a writer for Popbytes for almost three years now. He lives in Toronto with his boyfriend, his incredibly dumb but cute puppy, and his immortal cat.

Super Fresh Gossip From Around The Web!

Whitney Houston / Yaya Dacosta ANTM's Yaya DaCosta takes on Whitney Houston in Lifetime biopic of the singer's life OMG Blog
Ryan Gosling and Eva Mendes 'literally could not be more excited' about their baby Celebitchy
Lea Michele and the Glee cast share heartfelt messages about Cory Moneith :( PopSugar
Hugh Jackman recently shaved his head to play Blackbeard in the Peter Pan movie! SOW
Zac Efron has apaprently been hooking up with Michelle Rodriguez since 2011?! The Blemish
Glee's Becca Tobin's boyfriend, Matt Bendik, was found dead in his hotel room! ICYDK
The day we all haven't been waiting for is here, Paris Hilton has a new single out Celebslam
Oh my word ... this is one red carpet fashion disaster that no one should see! Hollywood Tuna
Watch: Sexy Dolce & Gabbana models hit on you ... while they suck on helium! Oh La La
Someone tell Lindsay Lohan that talk is cheap and actions speak louder than words Evil Beet
Brody Jenner went to Reggie Bush's wedding after skipping Kim Kardashian's wedding! Dlisted