‘The Situation’ is worth how much?!

Who has two thumbs, four abs, and is worth $5 million per year? That guy down there! Seriously. The Situation apparently makes about $5 million bucks off Jersey Shore, public appearances and endorsements per year, and all because he has abdominal muscles that look like a happy puppy. Take this information and kill yourself with it.

Mike Sorrentino, 29, reportedly earns $60,000 per episode of Jersey Shore and commands an appearance fee of $15,000 to $50,000. These paychecks put him at about $1 million before his many endorsements and branded products.

“We are really excited about all the opportunities coming Mike’s way,” his manager, Mike Petolino of Gotham Entertainment, told THR. “He has been able to secure many endorsement deals, business opportunities and additional television offers based on the success of the show. Our goal has always been to try to build a brand if the situation presented itself.” SOURCE

Hey, I like Jersey Shore as much as the next person (Read: It makes me want to set myself and everyone I love on fire), but are you fucking kidding me? He makes that much for having four abs? You can grate cheese and wash your laundry simultaneously on Erik Rhodes‘ abs, and even he doesn’t make that much. Well, maybe he would if he painted himself orange and acted like the biggest douche to ever douche a douche.

Jeremy Feist About Jeremy Feist

Jeremy Feist is an (ahem) entertainer from Toronto, Canada. He writes, acts, and performs on stage, and has been a writer for Popbytes for almost three years now. He lives in Toronto with his boyfriend, his incredibly dumb but cute puppy, and his immortal cat.

Super Fresh Gossip From Around The Web!

Kim Kardashian Things We Don't Want To See: Kim Kardashian upcoming book of her selfies! Evil Beet
Jennifer Aniston: Justin Theroux 'will put a gun to my head' if I get fillers like Botox! Celebitchy
Britney Spears is flaunting her (26th) new body with some very sexy pictures ... PopSugar
Jared Leto has been looking like Jesus for a while–now he is taking it even further ... SOW
Perennially constipated Kristen Stewart has lots to say in the new issue of ELLE The Blemish
Sorry everyone, but Kate Upton is not planning to get naked anytime soon! ICYDK
Avril Lavigne and Chad Kroeger have way more money than they should have! Celebslam
OMG, smelt it, dealt it ... Lady Gaga dropped a new fragrance–EAU DE GAGA OMG Blog
Madame Tussauds just unveiled their brand-new Selena Gomez wax figure Hollywood Tuna
Hottie Matthew Terry covers DANSK magazine's new autumn / winter issue! Oh La La
Oh, it's just Beyoncé reminding us (AGAIN) she's still in love with her husband ... Dlisted