I’m sure this must come as some sort of huge shock to all of you, but someone has come forward to say that The Situation has a tiny penis. No way, the guy who feels the need to constantly show off his four abs and give himself a ridiculous nickname might be compensating for something? Get out of town.
“I wouldn’t even call it a one-night stand, because he only lasted a few minutes,” Florida club promoter Melody Eckerson tells Star about their tryst in the Jersey Shore cast’s Miami Beach party pad. Things started out normal enough and Melody admits she was even imagining what it would be like to be his girlfriend. But she got a huge surprise when the reality TV star dropped his pants and revealed — a very tiny Situation! “Let’s just say, I’m thinking of my pinky,” Melody tells Star. SOURCE
Now before you all start flocking to Vinnie’s watermelon penis, just remember: This is from Star. For all we know, this “Melody Eckerson” person might be some sort of magical slutty unicorn from Fairy Whore Island. I may believe that The Situation has a tiny penis, I also believe that Star is staffed by six-year-olds who still don’t understand the difference between truth and lies. Prove me wrong, Star.