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The jig is up for Mariah Yeater!

The jig is up for Mariah Yeater!
November 17, 2011 JEREMY FEIST
Mariah Yeater

Yesterday, everyone found out that Mariah Yeater dropped her paternity suit against Justin Bieber, but that she was totally not backing down or anything because it would take the jaws of life to pry a white trash whore off of undeserved money. Anyway, it looks like her case might be completely busted, because TMZ got their hands on some leaked text messages where she asks someone to delete messages her mom sent saying that someone else is the baby, and in return she’ll give them a cut of that fake baby daddy money she’s been hankering for.

In the text, Yeater pleads for John to “ERASE ALL MESSAGES from my mom.” The text goes on to say that her mom sent John messages in the past, stating that baby Tristyn was fathered by Robbie — an ex-boyfriend. She then goes on to talk about giving John money if he cooperates: “Ill kick u when we get paid.” All of her texts end with Mariah Laci– Laci is Mariah’s middle name. And TMZ has seen many other texts between Mariah and John. In one text, Mariah writes, “[John], would you please stress to Robbie how important it is for him to be in his son’s life?..”  Apparently, Mariah forgot about this text, because she didn’t ask John to erase it.

Well, this cuts it: The entire thing was basically just Mariah’s way of turning a shitty, pedophilic fan fiction into money. If there’s anything we can take away from this, it’s that if you accidentally get pregnant when you’re a teenager, just try and get on Teen Mom. Because being on a show that glorifies the fact that you ruined your life with crippling, mind-numbing derpitude in exchange for money and boob jobs is a lot easier than trying to convince the world that the maple lesbian fathered your baby.

Mariah Yeater