Taylor Momsen is illegal!

First, let me just start off by saying that I try not to make fun of minors too often. Mostly because it’s too easy and too mean. That being said, what horrible personal tragedy happened in Taylor Momsen‘s life that would make her flash her breasts onstage?! When she is just seventeen-years-old? Which I’m pretty sure is one of those things that is creepy and wrong and illegal and goddammit this is why Chris Hansen has a job you bitch!

Wearing stripper heels and a necklace that said “Slave,” Taylor opened up her shirt and exposed her breasts (“tastefully” covered by pasties) during a PAPER Magazine & Express Celebrate “Rock The Sidewalk” event! Not only that, she ran her hands up and down her body, groping her chest after exposing it! SOURCE

And of course, there are pictures because western civilization is going to die horribly and people like Taylor are the cause of it. Just … Just GAH. Fun fact here: Later on today I’m doing a Halloween-themed scene with a guy who’s going to be covered in fake blood (What? corn syrup is delicious!) and I still just want to grab Taylor, stick her in a two-inch thick sweater and then ground her for a month with no TV or Facebook. It’s official: Taylor Momsen has turned me into my mother!


PHOTO | HOLLYWOOD LIFE

About JEREMY FEIST 5002 Articles
Jeremy Feist is an (ahem) entertainer from Toronto, Canada. He writes, acts, and performs on stage, and has been a writer for Popbytes for almost three years now. He lives in Toronto with his boyfriend, his incredibly dumb but cute puppy, and his immortal cat.