When culture pops, we wipe it up ...
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True story here: Back in January, my boyfriend got that sinus infection that's been going around, and at one point he got hit so hard by it that he collapsed and I nearly had to take him to the hospital. Thankfully, nothing bad happened, but at no point while he was lying on the floor and I was making sure he didn't pass out did I ever think "hey, this would be a good photo opportunity. Someone get me a camera and some attention!" So when Paris MORE
Some of you might remember a couple years ago when Paris Hilton's storage locker was auctioned off, and a bunch of incriminating stuff ended up exposed for everyone to see. Well, now it's happening to Lindsay Lohan, and you know your career has gone straight to hell when you start accidentally emulating Paris. Actually, purposely emulating Paris is probably even worse, so let's just cut our losses here and say that Paris is the origin of all MORE
This track "Last Night" is something that should have remained hidden ... it's Paris Hilton featuring Lil' Wayne, listen if you dare. It's totally a prime example of something that would have been best to leave alone, there's a reason crap like this doesn't get released or see the light of day. As for Paris' music career, it appears to be dead in the water at this point, I've been known to enjoy 2006's "Stars Are Blind" now and again but let's MORE
→ Paris Hilton sucks but her boyfriend, model River Viiperi (21) is so hot! I'm Not Obsessed → Alana 'Honey Boo Boo' Thompson eats like every day is Halloween! CityRag → Cody Simpson shared a shirtless photo after hitting a million Instagram followers PopCrush → Cee Lo Green is under investigation by the LAPD after a woman filed a complaint Yeeeah → Apparently Jessica's dad Joe Simpson now has a thing for young male MORE
Because it worked so well for Kim Kardashian, (has been) Paris Hilton decided to recycle an old Halloween costume yesterday, when she went out as Slutty Alice in Wonderland, just like she did back in 2007. Actually, for all we know, this could have very well been a non-slutty costume, but once it touches Paris' skin ... well, transient properties, people. Look it up. The Daily Mail reports ... Paris Hilton certainly could have come up with MORE
You know, in all this kerfuffle about Lindsay Lohan and Amanda Bynes driving into things that are alive, I almost forgot that Paris Hilton is scum-sucking trash! Well, as a neat little reminder that Paris is a miserable toss-pot who deserves no happiness ever, an alleged recording of her saying that gay guys are disgusting and that most them have AIDS made its way onto the internet, and -- Yes. Paris Hilton, in 2012, allegedly said those things. MORE
Generally speaking, Kim Kardashian and Paris Hilton have pretty similar skill sets and career paths: they were both born into rich families, have absolutely no talent or otherwise likeable traits whatsoever, got famous for a sex tape, and managed to turn that into a series of increasingly banal and insufferable TV shows, all the while pretending that they somehow earned all of this. So here's Kim making fun of Paris' sex tape, because being a MORE
Just in case you forgot, Paris Hilton is terrible at everything. But recently, she showed everyone that she is terrible at being a DJ, which really shouldn't come as a surprise because once again: Paris + Doing things = SUUUUUUUUUCK. But of course, when you desecrate an art form, it's only a matter of times before the artists start piling on you, which is just what happened when DJ Jane Bang released this wonderful diss track (listen to it below) MORE
Yesterday, pictures were plastered all over the web of Paris Hilton lying on the ground among a pile of men. While this normally isn't anything new, the fact that this was a part of an alleged paparazzi scuffle was. Today, RadarOnline has a video of someone purported to be Paris trying to grab a camera out of a paparazzo's hand for unexplained reasons. But if I had to guess: attention. She probably did it for attention. "It was 3:30 in the MORE
So yesterday, the web got its first glimpse at Paris Hilton failing at another art form, as Paris popped out her little Easy-Fake DJ Booth and tried to actually play music. By which I mean, she turned a knob that did absolutely nothing before accidentally playing a Rihanna song over her own song, and then someone had to come out and fix everything she did. It was glorious in its misery, it really was. Anyway, real DJ Deadmau5 saw what Paris was MORE
Last night, tossed aside socialite Paris Hilton made her premiere as a DJ in São Paulo, before you ask: no, I have no idea what Brazilians did to deserve this. It's the equivalent of waking up in a bathtub full of ice without your kidneys. The only person that we can blame for this is DJ Afrojack, the man who decided to help Paris be a DJ, I'm guessing because he lost a fiddling contest with the devil or something (This is why you read the fine MORE
There's something about living in Australia that apparently just erodes your ability to give a crap, because Aussie reporter Edwina Bartholomew clearly couldn't give one if she wanted to. Paris Hilton was down in Oz as part of her new career of following around people who are actually famous and talented she's dating, and decided to stop in at Channel 7 for an interview. Edwina decided to ask Paris about her waning "fame" to her face (side note: MORE
Sure, Paris Hilton may be a washed-up has-been whose career went from 'doing nothing' to 'somehow doing less than nothing', but thanks to years of annoyance by her coupled with her own continued need to exemplify the worst aspects of humanity, I keep writing about her. It's a wonderful thing. Anyway, Paris went to a party with her 'boyfriend' DJ Afrojack, and on the way in, basically told all of her friends to screw off because they didn't have MORE
Since Kim Kardashian has yet to get the hint that she's a stupid bag of cellulite whose beauty and fame fades with each passing second, Jon Hamm clarified his recent statement about how she and Paris Hilton are stupid whores that everyone thinks far too highly of after she got all pissy for the sake of publicity. It should be noted that Jon didn't actually say that Kim was smart, just that she was entitled to be pissed off because that's all MORE
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