When culture pops, we wipe it up ...
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In the on-going war between stupid assholes and entitled brats, there are no winners; only losers. Which brings me to the current legal clusterfrak between Justin Bieber and a paparazzo he allegedly hit. Of course, the entire thing is essentially bullshit, but I'll get into that after the blockquote from TMZ. We're told several witnesses at the scene say after the altercation, a lawyer walked up to the photog and said he could get a lot of MORE
Good news, everyone! Since Lindsay Lohan has managed to keep her nose clean for the past few months -- and hopefully, she'll be able to do so for the foreseeable future -- it looks like her probation might finally be over in just two more days. I almost want to say "what's the worst that can happen?" but if cartoons have taught me anything, it's that Lindsay will ironically fuck up in a comical fashion if I say that. TMZ reports: Sources tell MORE
All right, so it looks like Lindsay Lohan might be back to the point where her legal woes are almost behind her and she is hopefully staying as far away from drugs and alcohol as she possibly can, as evidenced by her latest probation hearing where Judge Stephanie Sautner praised LiLo for finally cleaning up her act (*knocks on wood*). TMZ reports: Lindsay Lohan just got yet another rave review from Judge Stephanie Sautner during her probation MORE
Just in case you've never been on the web before, there's still a huge legal shitstorm brewing between file sharing sites and record labels over illegal downloads of copyrighted music because blah blah blah money and legal jargon, I don't care. Point is, record labels hate sites like Megaupload. So major artists are lending support to the service by starring in a video (posted below), including Kanye West, Alicia Keys, Snoop Dogg, Diddy, and ... MORE
Oh my gosh, it finally might be happening: Lindsay Lohan may finally, really, ACTUALLY be going to jail. It turns out that Lindsay is "serious" about her probation now (we'll see how long that lasts) and she reportedly will concede she violated her probation and just get her punishment out of the way. Except hold on a second, last time Judge Stephanie Saunter said that if she ruled that Lindsay did violate her probation, she'd be going to jail. MORE
Well, holy shit, this might be getting us somewhere: Judge Saunter heard Lindsay Lohan's case as to why she hasn't completed any of her community service, why she got fired, and how she could look people in the eye and say that the real volunteers were meanies and that working with abused woman wasn't "fulfilling" enough for her, and has decided to revoke Lindsay's probation, pending a hearing November 2nd. So we can all look forward to Lindsay MORE
So as Ashton Kutcher and Demi Moore sit on the toledo deck of the Titanic, waiting for the last possible moment to jump the sinking ship that is their marriage, well ... it turns out the ship might not even exist, because a lawsuit is alleging that Demi and Ashton might not legally be married, and may have just gone through with the ceremony because People would pay $2 Million for pictures of a celebrity dog wedding. They're that easy. Via MORE
All right, get ready for the ultimate test to see if Lindsay Lohan can, in fact, do anything she wants and not go to jail. Not only has Lindsay been slacking on her community service, but it actually got to the point where Lindsay was FIRED from the place for skipping work and leaving early. FIRED. From a job she was required to do for FREE. Oh, and she also skipped out on her court-appointed therapy because she was busy "working" (side note: MORE
By now it's pretty safe to assume that Lindsay Lohan is out of her little crackmind and will sue anyone who says anything bad about her, no matter how true it is. Well, Pitbull apparently didn't know that, and according to TMZ, he's completely shocked that Lindsay Lohan is suing him for saying true things about her in one of her songs, and actually intended to help boost her career. Sadly, he probably actually did. Pitbull went into serious mode MORE
Not gonna lie: I just conked out and woke up on the sofa, and like a shining ray of light, the first thing I saw was that Lindsay Lohan is suing Pitbull (the rapper, not the dog breed) because he made a reference to her constantly almost going to jail in one of his songs because, you know, she IS constantly almost going to jail. Thank God she doesn't read this site, otherwise we'd be fucked. Lindsay is pissed, claiming in her lawsuit ... "the MORE
I swear this girl gets sued more often than she changes her underwear ... probably because by the looks of all those upskirt shots, she doesn't wear any. Aaaaaaanyway, it looks like Lindsay Lohan is taking another trip to the courthouse (or as she probably calls it at this point, "my second home where everyone yells at me") after she was sued for ... *Rolls the dice* Not paying for a stereo system. Yeah, that sounds right. Stephen Clark MORE
Oh look, another story about Lindsay Lohan going to court today. Awesome. Anyway, Lindsay had to appear in court for what basically amounted to a check-up concerning her parole. It turns out, that community service that Lindsay's been so gung-ho about participating in? It turns out in the past two months, she's only completed about 4 of the allotted 60 days she was supposed to. Judge Sautner made it clear, Lindsay had better complete her MORE
It's a day that ends in Y, which means that Lindsay Lohan is in legal trouble again because at this point, I'm pretty sure the woman eats subpoenas for breakfast like toast. Anyway, it looks like Dawn Holland, the Betty Ford Clinic worker that Lindsay allegedly smacked the shit out of last year after she tried to administer a breathalyzer test, is suing Lindsay for assault now because that sweet, sweet "Lindsay Lohan slapped me across the tits" MORE
Because as Dorothy Parker once said, "You can lead a whore to culture, but you can't make her think", Kim Kardashian is suing Old Navy over using a model (named Melissa Molinaro) that looked like her a while ago for one of their advertisements. In completely unrelated news, lesbians everywhere are cutting their hair in order to look less like Justin Bieber. Kim is filing a lawsuit against the clothing giant -- claiming they intentionally MORE
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