Kris Jenner’s Instagram got hacked

Kris Jenner

If there are two things that we know about Kris Jenner, it's that she will say or do anything for the sake of attention, and that she is evil. Evil, evil, evil. So of course, this morning she reported that her Instagram got hacked, which earned her attention, which in turn gave her the energy needed to reign over the Kingdom of the Damned for another 666 years. The hacked Instagram message, via TMZ ... So this happened today! Shout out to all MORE

Kim Kardashian and Kanye West got married?

Kanye West and Kim Kardashian

Real talk: this weekend, I got to see my cousin get married to the love of her life in a beautiful private ceremony that the entire family came together to create. It was lovely event, she was deliriously happy, and everyone had a good time. I bring that up because now that I know what a wedding is actually supposed to look like, I now hate Kris Jenner's "turn every wedding into a reality TV spectacle for fame and money" gambit even more. Which MORE

Steve Hirsch vows to return Kris Jenner’s sex tape (if it exists)

Kris Jenner

So far, we've spent the better part of a week discussing Kris Jenner's sex tape, which by the looks of it doesn't actually exist. For all we know, this was just another way for Kris to drum up publicity for all the nothing she does, and if that's the case, congratulations. You made us talk about how much we dislike you for another week. Mission accomplished, honey-buns. Anyway, now Vivid Video's head honcho Steve Hirsch is swearing that if such a MORE

Kim Kardashian is bad at charity!

Kim Kardashian

Last year, it was revealed that Kim Kardashian's Ebay charity auction for the Phillipines was really more like Kim making a gawddamn bank off stupid people and then throwing a couple coins to the less fortunate. This probably shouldn't have been a surprise, since Kim has built a career of being a greedy ass-blister, but everyone still read her the riot-act over it. It also prompted people to take a look at Kim Kardashian's "charity work", and MORE

Kris Jenner is thinking about posing for Playboy

Kris Jenner

Lately there's been a lot of talk about Kris Jenner having a fake sex tape, because apparently there's a market for cat demons in their late 50's. Who knew? Anyway, I initially wrote it off because there was no way Kris would make a sex tape unless she had a new show to pimp, but now it turns out Kris might be posing for Playboy. Sooooooo, maybe she a new show coming out? Movie? The 58-year-old mum of six, who let's face it, looks pretty foxy MORE

So we’re still pretending Kris Jenner’s sex tape exists?

Kris Jenner

Earlier this week, news got out that Kris Jenner was allegedly being extorted over a 'sex tape.' Except that Kris claimed the tape didn't exist, and I kind of believe her because anyone who saw such a tape would have died in seven days. Now RadarOnline released an interview with the guy who claims to have the tape, and by the sound of it, he doesn't exactly have the clearest endgame in mind here ... “She knew about this sex tape and did not MORE

Kim Kardashian wants Kris Jenner’s clothes when she dies

Kris Jenner

If you haven't read Vogue's interview / ass-kissing of Kim Kardashian yet, don't. Just don't. Unless you want to read someone unironically praise Kris Jenner's "apricot" skin. Personally, I'd say it's more along the lines of "corpse rot grey", but that works too. Anyway, there is one passage that's worth a look: the one where Kim basically admits that waits for Kris to die so that she and her sisters could steal all of her worldly possessions. MORE

Sarah Michelle Gellar: Canceling her Vogue subscription

Kim Kardashian and Kanye West / Vogue Magazine

Since Vogue magazine revealed Kim Kardashian and Kanye West as the cover models for their April 2014 issue, Twitter has been having an absolute field day tearing all of them down. Seriously, Tom and Lorenzo's take-down was particularly juicy, but Sarah Michelle Gellar wins for literally canceling her Vogue subscription and calling for others to do so. https://twitter.com/RealSMG/status/447104444144955394 The thing is, I respect Anna MORE

Kris Jenner: Threatened with a sex tape that doesn’t exist!

Kris Jenner

So, crazy news story here, but apparently Kris Jenner is beefing up her security detail after someone started threatening her. Here's the weird part though: He's threatening her with a sex tape that doesn't exist. And Kris would know which sex tapes do and do not exist because when Kim Kardashian was first trying to get famous, Kris was the one who fil- I mean, she is a very responsible adult who stays on top of things like this. RadarOnline MORE

Kim Kardashian has become her mother

Kim Kardashian

It's been a while since Kim Kardashian pulled out the selfie card for the sake of attention, mostly because the last time she did it, everyone called her out on photoshopping herself to look thinner. So of course, here's Kim posing in one of her younger sisters' swimsuits, since she's slowly becoming less famous while her sisters are getting more and more famous. Which brings me to my main thesis: Kim has officially turned into Kris Jenner. Think MORE

Kris Jenner staged Kimye’s engagement for her show

Kim Kardashian and Kanye West

In a shocking turn of events, that carefully choreographed, elaborately staged proposal from famewhore Kanye West to famewhore Kim Kardashian? Turns out that may have been put together for the sake of their terrible reality show, as orchestrated by master famewhore Kris Jenner. In Jenner’s declaration to the court, she bragged, ”I played a major role in organizing and running the event.” “As part of this,” she continued, according MORE

Kim Kardashian and Kanye West got a prenup!

Kim Kardashian and Kanye West

Proving that deep down, there's still at least some logic lurking in the collective hivemind of the beast known as Kimye (aka Kim Kardashian and Kanye West in case you're living under a rock), America's most easily mockable couple has signed a prenup before taking the plunge. To be fair, when you sing an entire song about the importance of signing prenuptial agreements to protect your assets, you'd look like an idiot if you didn't. RadarOnline MORE

Kanye & Kris Jenner are in a battle for Kim Kardashian’s soul

Kanye West and Kim Kardashian

Well, kind of. Apparently, Kanye West is pretty ticked off over what happened to Kim Kardashian when she ... 'accompanied' (let's call it that) that rich old dude to the Vienna Opera Ball. So much so that he's demanded that Kim no longer make 'paid appearances' (let's call it that.) But of course Kris Jenner is pissed because she makes money whenever Kim makes a paid appearance, and as her 'mother' / 'manager' (let's call it that) she's trying to MORE

Kim Kardashian probably won’t be going back to Vienna

Kim Kardashian

It's not often that I side with Kim Kardashian, mostly because she's evil, but when I do it's usually because she's facing down an even greater evil. Like today. Apparently, Kim went to Vienna to be the date of Richard Lugner for the Vienna Annual Opera Ball (an honor that has gone to Lindsay Lohan and Paris Hilton, so draw your own conclusions) and of course it went straight to sh!t. Apparently, someone went up to Kim dressed in blackface, then MORE