When culture pops, we wipe it up ...
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After six years on the air, it seems like America has finally come together to realize that the Kardashian sisters and their show are completely terrible, and their ratings are now plummeting so low that a show about rednecks calling ducks received double the viewership of E!'s Kourtney & Kim Take Miami. Gosh, I just can't imagine why that may be. Via RadarOnline ... The most recent episode of Kourtney & Kim Take Miami from March 17, 2013 MORE
If you've never heard of the term "jumping the shark," here's a quick refresher: The term comes from an episode of Happy Days where they ran out of ideas and just had Fonzi jump over a shark for no reason, and it's used to describe the exact moment a show officially stops giving a sh!t and starts creeping ever closer to cancellation. Anyway, on a new episode of Kourtney & Kim Take Miami, the Kardashian sisters decide to have a vagina-sniffing MORE
Some of you might remember this one, but a couple months ago, the Kardashians were accused of stealing the name of a makeup line, Kroma, for their own line, Khroma. Yeah, that's not much of a stretch. Well, the Khroma line just sent the Kardashians and their line a cease and desist, and in the interrim, the Kardashians' makeup line is being pulled from the shelves until the matter is settled. Side-note: HAHAHAHAHA! You suck Kim Kardashian! MORE
Because today's theme is apparently "stupid, misogynist a-holes saying horrible things," Scott Disick reportedly told his girlfriend and baby mama Kourtney Kardashian that she needed to lose weight faster after her pregnancy, because Scott is literally that guy from American Psycho. Kourtney needs to DTMFA before he drops a chainsaw on her from atop a stairwell while ranting about obscure 80's bands. RadarOnline reports ... “Last time MORE
Over the years, Kris Jenner has made millions of dollars and amassed tons of publicity by essentially turning her family into a 24/7 fame-whoring plant, to the point where even Joan Crawford would look at her and go, "wow, you really suck at this whole 'maternal' thing, don't you?" And then I like to imagine that Joan would beat Kris with a wire hanger before smashing her face into a bathroom floor covered in scouring powder. Anyway, yesterday, MORE
Some of you might remember a little while ago when Kim Kardashian's ex-cat, Mercy, suddenly died after she gave it away. Well, the brand new Kardashian Kristmas Kard -- The hard-C is the family's mortal enemy -- has made its way onto the internet, and the creepiest part is that they somehow found it appropriate to include a picture of Mercy, looking the most miserable I have ever seen a kitten look before. From Us Weekly ... The card features MORE
On paper, you would figure that a story about Kourtney Kardashian and Scott Disick finally getting engaged would be true, because Kris Jenner needs to fill some air time on E! with another contrived wedding special. But here's Kim Kardashian claiming that the story is completely untrue, because hey, if there's one person who knows fake weddings put together for publicity, it's Kim! Via TMZ ... Kim Kardashian may be a scaredy-cat when it comes MORE
Thus far, both Kim Kardashian and Khloé Kardashian have gotten married for the sake of putting together a crappy reality TV. And in all fairness, it's worked out super well, in that Kim immediately got divorced and everyone realized what a horrible fake she is. Well, Kris Jenner is now trying to recreate that magic by trying to get Kourtney Kardashian to do a shot-gun reality TV wedding! I know, how romantic. RadarOnline reports ... "[Kris] MORE
You know who has no business selling make-up to anyone? The Kardashians. Seriously, they don't put makeup on so much as they apply it with a paint roller. I've seen paper plate masks with more human-looking features than the Kardashians. Regardless, the Kardashians are ramping up to sell a line of cheap-ass make-up called Khroma Beauty, because people are stupid and the Kardashians are functionally illiterate. Except it turns out there's already MORE
Yes, we may have scored a minor victory for television when Jersey Shore was taken out back by MTV executives and shot, but there is still a ghostly presence of death looming for TV. And that dark shadow of hatred and despair is cast by Kim Kardashian's big, fake, injected ass. Turns out, the finale of the seventh season of Keeping Up With The Kardashians received 3.6 Million viewers, which means there are 3.6 Million people out there too stupid MORE
I remember about a year ago when Kim Kardashian ended her big fake sham wedding, I was talking with my mother when she said something along the lines of "Well, at this point the only way they could get worse is if one of them pulled a baby out of their vagina on TV." Well, Kourtney Kardashian went ahead and filmed her baby's birth, which actually involved her pulling her daughter out of her vagina with her own hands. The lesson learned in all of MORE
When you think of the Kardashian family, you think of An unwarranted sense of self-importance Fashion with an unshakeable sense of grossness to it Urine glamour apparently, because they keep putting out gaudy animal print garbage and people keep buying it. Anyway, the Kardashians have unveiled a new line of merchandise they probably had no input on: eyeglasses! All of a sudden, going through life without 20/20 vision seems like a viable option, MORE
In the wee hours of yesterday morning, Kourtney Kardashian and Scott Disick were proud to welcome a new magazine cover baby (I meant baby) into the world. Penelope Scotland Disick, their beautiful baby girl, will have a wonderful life with caring parents, assuming they're able to keep her as far away from Kris Jenner as they possibly can. Most kids check their closet and under their bed for the boogeyman; these ones make sure grandma isn't MORE
How was your day? Good? Do you feel loved by the people closest to you? That we live in a fair and just world? That there is a higher power and that he/she/it is a benevolent being who only wants good for us? Well, the Kardashian clan just inked a deal for a whopping $40 Million bucks to make three more seasons of their crappy, vapid and fake reality shows. I don't want to live on this planet anymore. Via TMZ: Sources connected to the deal MORE
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