Kim Kardashian: Rob’s weight is tarnishing my family’s name

Kim Kardashian

Not news: Kim Kardashian is a soulless douche-hole. News: Kim Kardashian is a soulless douche-hole who seems to think her brother's weight gain is bringing down the family name. No really. According to RadarOnline, the big reason why Rob Kardashian bailed on her and Kanye West's big famewhore wedding was because they had a blowout fight where Kim accused Rob of leaking info to the press. Oh, and Kim also thinks his physical appearance is tanking MORE

Beyoncé wasn’t too keen on Kimye’s wedding

Kim Kardashian and Kanye West

Either through blackmail, bribery, or outright dealing with the devil (NOT TODAY, SATAN! NOT TODAY!) Kim Kardashian at one point had Beyoncé and Jay Z planning on going to her wedding. But either because the pictures were destroyed, the check bounced, or because Satan didn't hold his end of the bargain, Beyoncé and Jay Z ended up pulling out at the last minute, and all was right with that specific part of the world. Even though Beyoncé since MORE

Place Your Bets: How long will Kim & Kanye’s marriage last?

Kim Kardashian and Kanye West Wedding Picture

I'll be honest, I debated about which Kim Kardashian and Kanye West wedding story I was going to run with -- since this thing will, without a doubt, churn about two weeks' worth of famewhoring, I limited myself to only one Kimye piece a day. You're welcome I guess? -- and there were more than a few to pick from. I very nearly went with the one about how the other Kardashians ran their brother out of the wedding because he was too fat, but then I MORE

Let’s just get Kim & Kanye’s stupid wedding out of the way …

Kim Kardashian and Kanye West

There really isn't any reason why we should be posting today: It's Memorial Day, and even though I'm in Canada, this still kind of applies to me. But still, Kim Kardashian and Kanye West's marriage happened in Italy, and we just all have to pretend like this is an important thing that happened instead of the set-up to a fabulously prolonged divorce. Anyway, yeah, they got married. It was presumably a gaudy mess that they will turn into a reality MORE

Is Jay Z talking smack about Kim Kardashian’s wedding?

Kanye West, Beyoncé, Jay-Z, Kim Kardashian

Kim Kardashian and Kanye West's wedding is this weekend, so if over the next couple days you sense an encroaching, inescapable feeling of dread and despair, that's what's happening. (Have you made peace with your lord? No? Oh dear ...) Anyway, Kim has been pretty adamant about having Jay Z and Beyoncé at her wedding, which is hilarious because Beyoncé quite clearly hates her. According to RadarOnline, she's even gone so far as to talk sh!t MORE

Ray J wants to give Kim Kardashian sex tape profits for her wedding?

Ray J and Kim Kardashian

Last time Kim Kardashian got (ahem-hem) 'married"' for all of two months, the news of her temporarily wedded bliss was overshadowed by the fact that literally everyone in the world remembered her sex tape and immediately ran off to buy it again. So of course, now that she's getting (ahem-hem) 'married' again, it looks like it's time for another story about Kim's Vivid Video sex tape, as Ray J is gifting her four months of royalties for her MORE

Kim Kardashian had Joan Rivers moved away from her

Joan Rivers

There are a lot of celbs who dislike funny lady Joan Rivers because she routinely reads them to filth. There are a lot of celebs (and people in general) who hate Kim Kardashian because she's a selfish, vapid douche who gained millions of unearned dollars without ever working a day in her life. So naturally, Joan and Kim hate each other too, and Kim had Joan moved away from her during the NBC upfronts, because we live in a world where Kim has that MORE

Obama still wants nothing to do with Kim Kardashian

Kim Kardashian

Like most of America (actually, most of the world) President Barack Obama doesn't want to be associated with Kim Kardashian, especially since she's apparently political poison. Of course, this didn't stop Kim from trying to get chummy with him the president, because she's on the cover of Vogue. That is a privilege saved exclusively for the most famous and sophisticated of women! Or, failing that, you can make your husband buy it for you. MORE

Kim Kardashian and Kanye West got married?

Kanye West and Kim Kardashian

Real talk: this weekend, I got to see my cousin get married to the love of her life in a beautiful private ceremony that the entire family came together to create. It was lovely event, she was deliriously happy, and everyone had a good time. I bring that up because now that I know what a wedding is actually supposed to look like, I now hate Kris Jenner's "turn every wedding into a reality TV spectacle for fame and money" gambit even more. Which MORE

Kim Kardashian & Kanye West are getting married this week?

Kim Kardashian and Kanye West

Later this year, Kim Kardashian and Kanye West are going to film their reality TV special where they get married in a French castle or something, because everyone knows that wedding episodes always do insane numbers in the ratings. It's the reason why shows always save them for either sweeps or season finales. Anyway, presumably so that they can squeeze in a full dress rehearsal before filming starts, Kim and Kanye are reportedly going to be MORE

Kim Kardashian is buying all her own Vogue magazine covers

Kim Kardashian and Kanye West / Vogue Magazine

When Kim Kardashian got the cover of Vogue (because of Kanye West, let's be honest) everyone kind of assumed that the issue would bomb because no fashion-savvy person would ever buy anything with Kim on it. Except it turns out the magazine sold decently well, and a big reason for it is that Kim is apparently buying stacks of them for herself. TMZ reports ... Kim Kardashian cannot get enough of herself ... hitting up a newsstand on Tuesday to MORE

Jay Z and Beyoncé are bailing on Kimye’s wedding

Kanye West, Beyoncé, Jay-Z, Kim Kardashian

Remember all those stories about how Beyoncé has been absolutely dreading the idea of going to Kim Kardashian and Kanye West's wedding because she can't be around her for more than five seconds without getting a case of the douche chills? Well, according to The Daily Mail, she and hubby Jay Z decided to bail out on the whole big event because they don't want to be on one of the Kardashians' reality TV specials. Austin Powers: Goldmember? Sure, MORE

Beyoncé still doesn’t want to be friends with Kim Kardashian!

Kim Kardashian and Beyonce

I guess technically, this isn't considered news since Beyoncé has always hated being around Kim Kardashian and that hasn't changed in the slightest, but still, it's just good to hear. Ya know? Anyway, according to RadarOnline, Beyoncé still refuses to be apart of Kim's famewhorin' game after the two of them ran into each other the other day ... An eyewitness to the ladies’ awkward encounter at Dr. Howard Lancer’s Beverly Hills office MORE

Kim Kardashian labeled ‘Political Poison’

Kim Kardashian

We try to stay clear of politics, mostly because we don't want the vitriolic left v. right debate to get in the way of my precious dick jokes. But if there's one thing that people from both sides of the debate can agree upon, it's that Kim Kardashian is terrible. And according to RadarOnline, it's gotten to the point where Kim has been labeled 'political poison' and gets barely a fraction of a percentage of the respect people have for pop star MORE