When culture pops, we wipe it up ...
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So remember when Charlie Sheen gave Lindsay Lohan $100,000 for her taxes out of the kindness of his heart? Then we were all like, "Gosh, I wonder what she had to do for that?" Then we all mimed giving a blowjob? Well, according to National Enquirer, that's the basic gist of it yeah. Via Celebitchy ... “Charlies is in hot pursuit of Lindsay,” said a source. “He wants her to be his new goddess. Charlie has a soft spot for lost causes MORE
Despite the fact that Liz & Dick was reviled by everyone who saw it, got less viewers than Lifetime's remake of Steel Magnolias, and has done more to tarnish Liz Taylor's reputation than White Diamonds ever did, Lindsay Lohan seems to think that this will be her big break into TV. Technically, when you set off a bomb, it creates a big break, so I can sort of see her thinking here. Via RadarOnline ... "Lindsay has asked her manager and MORE
Because Lindsay Lohan's biggest problem is that she isn't given enough unwarranted breaks in her life, her Scary Movie 5 co-star, Charlie Sheen, reportedly gave her $100,000 to help her cover her unpaid taxes. Bear in mind, this is the same Lindsay Lohan who reportedly made $2 Million last year and is currently set to make another $2 Million this year, but yes, this poor, starving person really needs financial help. TMZ reports ... During MORE
Oh for ... no, NO. Seriously, Charlie Sheen was the first celebrity I actually had to lay-off of because I wasn't entirely sure the poor guy wasn't going to accidentally off himself. That, and you can only make so many jokes about "WINNING!" and "TIGER BLOOD" before the dead horse gets up and says, "Would you quit hitting me? This accomplishes nothing." Anyway, after Charlie got clean, the world let up, but now it seems like Charlie may be crazy MORE
If you book Lindsay Lohan for any sort of gig that involves her acting in a professional manner, one of two things will happen: either she won't show up, or she'll show up and take a bunch of stuff, because don't you know who she is? She was in Confessions of a Teenage Drama Queen! BOW BEFORE THE QUEEN! Anyway, after skipping out on work on the set of Scary Movie 5, RadarOnline says that Lindsay finally showed up and allegedly grabbed $15,000 MORE
Remember how Lindsay Lohan finally got around to reading the script and immediately tried to fake walking pneumonia so that she could back out of it before someone helpfully pointed out to her that she's about as employable as an art history major? Well, turns out the scene in question involved her and Charlie Sheen making out, so read into that whatever you will. EntertainmentWise reports ... The 26-year-old actress seemed at ease with her MORE
Because the only thing less timely than a Black Swan spoof is a bunch of Charlie Sheen jokes, he of the perpetual drug-induced frenzy has signed on to star in Scary Movie 5. And in what I'm sure is just a total coincidence, Lindsay Lohan has also signed on, so I'm just going to go ahead and assume that half of the script is just snorting while Ashley Tisdale fires her agent. E! Online reports ... Maybe being the next Anna Faris is just what MORE
They say hindsight is 20/20, although I'm not sure how accurate that is when you've taken so many drugs through your eyeballs that you cry heroin tears. Anyway, now that Charlie Sheen has been off Two and a Half Men for a while and he can finally get some distance between himself and what is objectively a shitty show, Charlie has finally seen the light and realized that Two and a Half Men was actually always just a really shitty show, that his MORE
Since there are only a little more than three days left until the end of the year, it's time for everyone to make lists! Lists! Lists out the freaking wa-zoo! Anyway, a real estate site called Zillow just published their list of the celebrities that people would least like to live next to, and what a surprise, the cast of the Jersey Shore is first, followed by Charlie Sheen, Lindsay Lohan and Kim Kardashian. Notice a pattern here? For the MORE
I know, I know, I declared a moratorium on all things Charlie Sheen a while ago, but it seems the guy has sobered up and apparently has no plans on having that overdose that we can all see coming around the corner so since I’m sure he won’t be dying any time soon, it’s okay to make jokes on the Internet about him. Anyway, after literally daring his boss to fire him and then imploding in an orgy of cheap gold-diggers and crystal MORE
Despite the fact that the Charlie Sheen bandwagon has more or less broken down, spontaneously combusted, had its fire pissed out, and was sold to a scrap metal factory for two buttons and some lint, Comedy Central figured that now was the opportune time to host a roast of Charlie, I'm guessing so that we can all finally hear the five jokes that haven't been run into the ground about a violent, abusive, drug-addicted nutjob. Below, a few of said MORE
• Guess who posted a nude pic to show her Twitter fans how healthy she looks? Tabloid Prodigy • Are Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie finally going to tie the knot this summer? Dlisted • Lynne Spears takes a dip with her grandkids and shows off her swimsuit body! PopSugar • Justin Theroux met secretly with his ex to apologize for dating Jennifer Aniston? Cele|bitchy • Lindsay Lohan is angry over not being considered to star in MORE
Just days after the final, remaining joke about Charlie Sheen had been made, Comedy Central decided to roast him which is sort of like jumping on the bandwagon after the band has already died from drug overdoses and auto-erotic asphyxiation. Anyway, Brooke Mueller has decided to get in on this by declaring that they can make fun of everyone but her, because as we all know, that's how comedy works. Sources close to Mueller tell TMZ ... she MORE
Following in the footsteps of Sandra Bullock, Denise Richards adopted (what my former editor Stacey once dubbed) a 'revenge baby', which is a little baby that you love and cherish out of the goodness of your heart and just to spite your evil worm of an ex. Maybe I'm reading too far into it, you say? Well, consider this: Denise named her newly adopted baby girl after The Plaza Hotel New York's suite Eloise which Charlie Sheen destroyed after he MORE
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