When culture pops, we wipe it up ...
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If you completely forgot about the time Ashton Kutcher and Demi Moore split up, here's a refresher: Ashton Kutcher allegedly cheated on Demi with a bunch of random floozies, and then Demi had a breakdown and started doing whip-its. But apparently, everyone saw this as a viable relationship and assumed they were getting back together after the two of them were spotted together last night, except now they're just back to being civil to each other. MORE
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Yesterday, Sara Leal allegedly revealed that a "mystery friend" of hers had pictures of Ashton Kutcher, which allegedly proved that Ashton is cheating on Mila Kunis. Allegedly. Well, here's a report from National Enquirer stating that Lindsay Lohan is somehow allegedly squeezing money out of Ashton like a cash sponge, which I'm sure has no relation to yesterday's story. Sources say the two had a brief fling years ago, so Ashton feels obligated MORE
As some of you might remember, Ashton Kutcher's last relationship with Demi Moore ended after reports of him cheating on her with Sara Leal surfaced, and it effectively ended their relationship and drove Demi to sucking the nitrous oxide out of used whipped cream cans. Turns out, according to a new report from Hollywood Life, Ashton is allegedly already cheating on Mila Kunis with, weirdly enough, an acquaintance of Sara Leal. Well, points for MORE
We all know Ashton Kutcher is kind of a dbag but I'd still hit it, you guys. Whatever he's cute. He almost killed the cuteness -- LITERALLY -- while filming the Steve Jobs biopic. Because he's such a serious method actor and stuff, he decided to go on the extreme fruit-only diet the tech mastermind favored (why do you think he named the company Apple?) It's called the fruitarian diet, and it's dumb. Why? "First of all, the fruitarian diet can MORE
For some reason, Angus T. Jones went on a public screed about how Two and a Half Men was filth, and somehow managed to not get fired. Except now Ashton Kutcher is campaigning hard to have Angus fired, because really, when you get paid $350,000 per episode and you decide to take a steaming dump on that because some smooth talking preacher told you so, you kinda deserve to get kicked to the curb. From Showbiz Spy: “Right after Angus appeared MORE
Because apparently, racists really enjoy the taste of mediocre chips, the people at Popchips decided it would be a great idea if they got together with Ashton Kutcher and create a racist caricature of Indian people by making them all look like creepy weirdos. Guess who doesn't like that? Here's the thing: I'm firmly of the belief that nothing is off the table when it comes to comedy. That being said, if you're going to make a joke that might MORE
The fact that Ashton Kutcher is a colossal idiot probably shouldn't be a surprise to anyone at this point, since he cheated on his wife during their anniversary and has been repeatedly accused of allegedly using his shows and work to promote his own investments. But now everyone in country music hates him too, after he showed up to the Country Music Awards (no, I don't know why either) wearing what can only be described as 'Mystique's country MORE
Personally, if I happened to be starring in Battleship ("Only the second worst movie you'll ever see about pegging!" - not the actual tag line) and had to answer questions about it at a press conference, I would be only too glad to talk about anything other than that piece of shit. Suppressing a cat's anal glands? Sure. Ex-boyfriends and why I dumped them? Absolutely. But Rihanna doesn't feel the same way, because when someone asked her to talk MORE
Last week, rumors started going around that Ashton Kutcher was making sweet love with Rihanna, which is crazy because RiRi isn't fifty-years old. Turns out, they've might have been doing each other for almost three months now. The Sun reports: The 24-year-old singer hit if off with Two and a Half Men hunk Ashton at a mutual pal's house party in Los Angeles last December. The Umbrella singer is so besotted with Ashton, 34, that she has asked MORE
The Good News: Rihanna might not be back to having sex with that one guy who beat the shit out of her with a car door and then used her face as a chew toy. The Bad News: turns out, she might be having sex with Ashton Kutcher, which is almost as bad, but in a totally different way. RadarOnline reports: The Caribbean Queen was spotted leaving the Two and a Half Men star’s Los Angeles mansion early Thursday after arriving four hours earlier. MORE
As more and more reports surface claiming that Demi Moore is clinging to extreme youth (by which I mean she really wants to be sixteen apparently) this one about how she tried to initiate a hook-up with Zac Efron might be the least sad at this point, because as everyone knows, banging Zac is way better than sucking nitrous oxide out of an empty can of whipped cream. Us Weekly reports: "She's been really down, and she's surrounding herself with MORE
I may not know much about wooing the fairer sex (I'll stick with the less fair sex, thank you very much), but if I had to guess, I'd say that if your wife is willing to file for divorce because you can't stop banging random whores on the day of your anniversary, it'll probably take more than a car to win her back. But of course, this is Ashton Kutcher we're talking about, who is a colossal moron, so it really shouldn't surprise any of you that he MORE
In the wake of last night's news that Demi Moore was getting finally a divorce from Ashton Kutcher because he just can't stop sticking his cock into things that aren't his wife ("Am I married to this electric pencil sharpner? Whoopee! *whrrrrrrrGGGGGZZGZGGT!*") you would figured that most people would be focused on the important parts of the proceedings, like splitting assets, or instances of infidelity. Instead, here's Us Weekly asking the oh so MORE
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