Paris Hilton and her boyfriend ran someone over!

With Lindsay off doing rails with her mother in rehab, someone has to take the title of “Celebrity train wreck we all hope ODs on crystal meth and cough syrup”. That person is Paris Hilton. Anyway, she and her on/off again boyfriend Cy Waits decided to take a page from Lilo’s book by getting into a hit and run. Only Paris and her dick-of-the-week only managed to run over an adult. What, no babies? You pussies.

The car was surrounded by paparazzi when an eyewitness says Cy Waits “gunned” the car and hit the woman, who was knocked to the pavement. The video shows Waits rolled down his window and asked if the pap was OK, to which another photographer responded, “yes” and told him to go. Waits and Hilton then left the scene of the accident, but then on the video, you can hear someone yelling, “hit and run … hit and run.” SOURCE

Nicely done you guys. Bang up job. I’m not really sure how the legal system works down WeHo, but if it’s at all possible to just give them the chair, that would be great. Hell, if you gave them both lethal injections for, I don’t know, littering let’s say, I’m sure you’d be completely validated in doing so. The sooner we make it a punishable offense to be Paris, the sooner we make the world a better place.

Jeremy Feist About Jeremy Feist

Jeremy Feist is an (ahem) entertainer from Toronto, Canada. He writes, acts, and performs on stage, and has been a writer for Popbytes for almost three years now. He lives in Toronto with his boyfriend, his incredibly dumb but cute puppy, and his immortal cat.

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