Don’t you just love it when an article you just assumed as a post on The Onion turns out to be a true story? Yeah, well here’s one now: Mary-Kate and Ashley Olsen are selling a $55,000 handbag. And it’s covered in pills because, honestly, for $55,000, you would totally need to be on something before, during, and after the purchase. TooFab reports …
Starting December 12th, nine limited edition handbags from the Olsens’ fashion line The Row will go on sale online and they’ll all cost you more than a pretty penny. The bags, created by artist Damien Hirst, are covered in prescription pills and made from black patent leather Nile crodocile skin. Only twelve of each bag will be made. And while the price is INSANE, a portion of the proceeds will be donated to UNICEF. No word on how much, exactly.
I like to imagine this conversation took place:
Mary-Kate: So check out this new handbag!
Ashley: We’re charging $55,000 for it, for absolutely no reason whatsoever!
Sane person: Doesn’t that seem like a lot of money for one stupid little handbag? And don’t you think the pills glamorize drug use, which would be in especially poor taste considering Heath Ledger overdosed in your apartment?
Mary-Kate: It’s okay, because we’re donating part of the proceeds to charity!
Ashley: We’re good people!
Sane person: Unless you’re donating ALL profits to UNICEF, you’d still be making an astronomical sum of money off a tacky-ass purse that probably doesn’t cost anywhere near the stated price. Wouldn’t that make the two of you shameless opportunists clumsily hiding behind a imaginary, thin veil of philanthropy?
Ashley: SMOKE BOMB! (*Throws a smoke bomb at the ground.*)
Sane person: Did you two escape?
Mary-Kate: No, we’re still here.
Ashley: We just turned side-ways.