WHEN MUSIC POPS, WE TURN IT UP

Nicki Minaj has a sex tape now!

Nicki Minaj has a sex tape now!

So this morning, we had a giant-ass storm here in Toronto which knocked my internet connection out, so that was bad. Then I got an email from my parents which basically boils down to “come to my house first or you’re not getting your gifts”, so that was worse. So I’m starting off with this story about Nicki Minaj having a sex tape. Why? BECAUSE MY GIFT TO YOU IS PAIN! PAIN!!!

Mediatakeout.com reportedly screened the tape, which is being hawked for $100,000. The video was believed to be made before Minaj shot to fame and comes in the end of her huge music year, which includes the release of her debut album Pink Friday. The album has sold over 500,000 units since its November 22nd release. SOURCE

Never mind the fact that the sex tape cannot be legally released without her consent, because Nicki needs to sell her album. Now if you’ll excuse me, I have to go have a full-on Clark Griswold-style meltdown while downing eggnog until my liver resigns in protest. Ho ho ho!