Mel Gibson to star in ‘Machete Kills’?

Mel Gibson

Because people just can’t seem to get enough of rage-filled, dangerously unhinged lunatics who scream about how they want to stab their ex-wives while having anal sex with them (I know, that sounds like a joke, but that actually happened). Mel Gibson may be up for a part in director Robert Rodriguez‘s upcoming flick Machete Kills (a sequel to 2010’s Machete). Yes, give Mel Gibson a huge death knife and tell him to go nuts. Nothing could possibly go wrong there. Via Huffington Post:

Gibson and Machete were first associated earlier this month when Deadline reported that Rodriguez was looking to cast the 56-year-old actor in his new film, along with Michelle Williams. No word yet if Williams will participate in this bit of genre madness. “I feel like I really need to get in there and do it,” Rodriguez told THR about directing the film himself (the first Machete was co-directed by Rodriguez and Ethan Maniquis due to scheduling issues). “It’s just a lot of fun; it’s a really cool concept, and I think it takes it to another level in a way that’s compelling for me to go and do it myself.”

Once again, why would anyone do this? Why would someone give Mel a machete, then tell him to get as angry as he possibly can? That’s like putting your balls in an alligator’s mouth while insulting the alligator’s mother. “Hey Alligator, don’t my balls taste like your mom’s mouth? HAHA! It’s funny because I banged your Mom last- OH GOSH THIS IS A PAIN WORSE THAN I HAVE EVER FELT.”

Mel Gibson

About JEREMY FEIST 5002 Articles
Jeremy Feist is an (ahem) entertainer from Toronto, Canada. He writes, acts, and performs on stage, and has been a writer for Popbytes for almost three years now. He lives in Toronto with his boyfriend, his incredibly dumb but cute puppy, and his immortal cat.