Lindsay Lohan turned down ‘Dancing With The Stars’

Lindsay Lohan

As it stands, Lindsay Lohan is currently looking down the barrel of a long jail sentence, her performance and professionalism (or lack thereof) on her last film has turned into a Hollywood punchline, and her last big gig was going on a “date” with a wealthy prince for $100,000. So when the producers of Dancing With The Stars offered her over $500,000 to appear on their show, Lindsay turned it down because everything seems like a good idea when you have enough Everclear in your system. TMZ reports …

Sources close to Lindsay tell us, the actress was made several offers to join the DWTS cast this upcoming season — offers that maxed out at $550,000. But Lindsay — who still owes hundreds of thousands in back taxes — shut them down, telling friends she’d never consider doing reality TV … she wants to stick to films. But there’s one problem — after The Canyons fiasco, she’s basically made herself unhireable. And as the saying goes, beggars can’t be choosers.

The sad thing is, an appearance on DWTS actually could have helped Lindsay recoup her image and maybe land herself some new opportunities. (Remember when Kirstie Alley scored herself a TV show after her stint on DWTS? ‘Nuff said.) Except then you remember that Lindsay would actually have to stand up right and move around without falling.

Maksim: All right Lindsay, all you have to do this week is show up and not fall down drunk, and we’ll automatically get through to the finals. That is literally all you have to do.
Lindsay: I’m sorry, what did you say? I can’t hear you because you’re not a bottle of gin.
Ginny the Magic Gin Bottle: You’re better than this Lindsay! You should be Queen of the Moon!
Lindsay: You’re right Ginny!
Maksim: WHY ARE YOU TALKING TO AN EMPTY GIN BOTTLE?
Lindsay: To the moon! *Runs out to her car, immediately slams into Tom Bergeron.* I win!

Lindsay Lohan

About JEREMY FEIST 5002 Articles
Jeremy Feist is an (ahem) entertainer from Toronto, Canada. He writes, acts, and performs on stage, and has been a writer for Popbytes for almost three years now. He lives in Toronto with his boyfriend, his incredibly dumb but cute puppy, and his immortal cat.