Lindsay Lohan’s new lawyer sounds like a winner!

So remember how Lindsay Lohan fired Shawn Holley, aka the only reason she isn’t currently blowing prison guards for sandwiches, and then replaced her with the guy who represented Jon Gosselin? Well, it’s getting worse: turns out, Mark Heller can’t actually practice law in Los Angeles, where all of Lindsay’s legal trouble is, and he had to be sponsored by a socialite who hasn’t practiced the law in seventeen years. In related news, Shawn was last seen doing cartwheels down Rodeo Drive, screaming “I’M FREE! I’M FREE!” From TMZ

TMZ broke the story … Lindsay fired Shawn Holley last week and hired New York attorney Mark Heller, to rep her in her lying-to-cops criminal case in L.A.. Heller can ONLY rep Lindsay if he gets a sponsor who is admitted to practice law in California, but worry not — there are more than 200,000 to choose from. Then again … Heller may have had problems finding a sponsor, because the person he got hasn’t practiced law in California since 1996. Her name is Lindsay Berger Sacks. She was admitted to practice law in 1994 and became an inactive member of the bar 2 years later — meaning she couldn’t practice anymore. Berger Sacks — who we’re told is a pretty big L.A. socialite and co-founder of the Doheny Dining Club — reactivated her membership last Tuesday … we’ve learned it’s just three days before Heller filed legal docs to represent Lindsay. Heller listed Berger Sacks as his sponsor.

Meanwhile, Lindsay is still chasing after The Wanted’s singer Max George (pictured below in a recent Instagram shot) and completely ignoring the fact that she’s facing a megaton of jail time. If the fact that Lindsay is completely shirking responsibility so that she can chase down short-term, instant gratification while ignoring the cost of doing such: Welcome to the web! Everything you could ever scream at and/or masturbate to can easily be found with a simply Google search.

Lindsay Lohan and Max George

Jeremy Feist About Jeremy Feist

Jeremy Feist is an (ahem) entertainer from Toronto, Canada. He writes, acts, and performs on stage, and has been a writer for Popbytes for almost three years now. He lives in Toronto with his boyfriend, his incredibly dumb but cute puppy, and his immortal cat.

Super Fresh Gossip From Around The Web!

Tila Tequila Tila Tequila announced on Facebook recently that she is ten weeks pregnant! The Blemish
James Franco called a New York Times theater critic a 'little bitch' over a bad review Celebitchy
The Stupid Awards: Jessica Simpson's baby daddy Eric treats their kid like a football! Bohomoth
How cute do Mariah Carey and her hubby Nick Cannon look in their Easter costumes? SOW
Khloé Kardashian and French Montana are said to be casually dating each other! ICYDK
Cameron Diaz claims that model Kate Upton is more than just big ol' titties! Celebslam
OMG, he's naked: Big Brother Canada contestant Kenny Brain's NSFW Grindr pics! OMG Blog
Why anyone would want to use singer Selena Gomez to help sell shoes? Hollywood Tuna
Dolce&Gabbana's eyewear ads with Noah Mills, Evandro Soldati and Adam Senn Oh La La
Remember when Lindsay Lohan wrote a list of dudes she banged and we all saw it? Evil Beet
Miley Cyrus has postponed the remainder of her US Bangerz tour until August! Dlisted