Site Meter

Lindsay Lohan is facing eight months of jail!

In the past year, Lindsay Lohan lied to police over wreckless driving, punched a woman in the face (allegedly), and was the central suspect in a theft case that was dropped after the guy who got robbed conveniently refused to press charges. In a logical universe, LiLo would actually be forced to serve the eight months of jail time after her probation is revoked tomorrow, but this is reality, so Lindsay will probably be forced to watch an episode of Oz before the LAPD takes her out for Dairy Queen. TMZ reports …

Law enforcement sources connected with her most recent case tell TMZ … when Lindsay is arraigned Wednesday for allegedly lying to cops and reckless driving in connection with her car accident last June … the judge will revoke her probation in the jewelry heist case and set a date for a hearing to formally decide if Lindsay violated the terms of her probation by breaking the law again.

We’re told the hearing will be conducted at the same time Lindsay stands trial on the criminal charges. And get this — even if Lindsay is found not guilty in the criminal case, the judge can still rule she violated her probation because the standard of proving a probation violation is significantly lower than proving guilt beyond a reasonable doubt. The stakes for Lindsay are high — up to 8 months in jail, and that doesn’t include jail time if she’s convicted in the car accident case.

Sources tell us … the L.A. City Attorney is “out for blood” and they will file papers Wednesday asking that Lindsay’s probation be revoked. Fact is … the judge does it on her own … the prosecutors don’t even have to ask for it, but their voice will certainly be heard.

Wait, do they actually think Lindsay will actually have to answer for her actions? HA! Adorable. No, Lindsay has done way worse than this, and faced zero repercussions from it. Let me break down how this will go: I’ll end up camping by my laptop for the better part of a day so I can watch Lindsay traipse into the courthouse in a $10,000 outfit, her lawyer will somehow manage to get her out of it because the woman is legal genius, and Lindsay will go back to being stunt-cast in B-movies. If this doesn’t happen exactly as I described it, I will punch myself in the mouth.

Lindsay Lohan

Jeremy Feist About Jeremy Feist

Jeremy Feist is an (ahem) entertainer from Toronto, Canada. He writes, acts, and performs on stage, and has been a writer for Popbytes for almost three years now. He lives Toronto with his boyfriend, his incredibly dumb but cute puppy, and his immortal cat.

Super Fresh Gossip From Around The Web!

Chris Pine Star Trek hottie Chris Pine admits he loves a good cry in Men's Health magazine! The Frisky
Kim Kardashian's pregnancy feet are beyond insane looking, see 'em for yourself! Celebslam
Apparently Madonna went out of her way to snub Gwyneth Paltrow at the Met Gala! Celebitchy
Everyone is making the same joke that Beyoncé's going to name her baby Red Vine BuzzFeed
Rumor has it that DJ cutie Calvin Harris and singer Rita Ora are now a couple! The Blemish
Rihanna sure knows how to make her booty pop for pictures! (site NSFW) Drunken Stepfather
Supermodel Christy Turlington graces the cover of the new Harper's Bazaar I'm Not Obsessed
Rumor Mill: Johnny Depp and Amber Heard are engaged – and about to go public! ICYDK
Gross! Famewhore Farrah Abraham is now selling her dirty and used bikini on eBay! IDLYITW
Take a listen to American Idol winner Candice Glover's debut single, "I Am Beautiful" Rickey
Calvin Klein revealed actress Rooney Mara as the face of its new fragrance at Cannes PopSugar
Isabella Rossellini is finally back with a third season of Sundance's Green Porno OMG Blog
Here's Candice Swanepoel heating things up for Interview (Germany) magazine Hollywood Tuna
A Legend Is Reborn: The first trailer for Jonathan Rhys Meyers' Dracula on NBC! Oh La La
Carly Rae Jepsen and Justin Bieber are both Canadian, so they have an unbreakable bond Evil Beet
FYI: Farrah Abraham was only fifteen-years-old when she lost her anal virginity! Dlisted

Rickey.org Celebitchy BuzzFeed The Frisky
ArjanWrites I Don't Like You In That Way PopSugar Oh La La