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Lindsay Lohan is completely sane!

Lindsay Lohan is completely sane!
July 12, 2011 JEREMY FEIST
Lindsay Lohan

Remember how Lindsay Lohan said that she’s totally going to re-haul her image? For like the 32nd time in the space of about two years? Yeah, about that … she let a reporter follow her around so that she could show everyone how much she’s changed, and since this is Lilo: Fuck-Up Extraordinaire, she ends up coming off as a colossal lunatic.

“In the chauffeured Lincoln Navigator, it was all about puffing Parliament Lights and Miami chitchat with her entourage. Lindsay traveled with a revolving pack of pseudo-chaperones, whose most responsible member was her 17-year-old sister, Aliana.”

“As we pulled up to the Fontainebleau, a bright-orange parking cone was blocking the entrance,” Powers writes. “Not accustomed to waiting, apparently, she lowered the car’s window and shouted, ‘Move that cone. I’m Lindsay Lohan.’

“And it was done. This foreshadowed the arrogance and demanding personality she exhibited as her sweet-girl façade started slipping.”

“Lindsay’s aura — while professional — seemed almost melancholy. She was pretty and talented, albeit a little sad and weary. And constantly looking for drama, whether it was picking a fight with her younger sister … or freaking out over a lost pair of Zanotti heels.”

“Saturday was another night at LIV, and all that implies. Sunday was an all-day party in the penthouse and on the beach. When I arrived at The Raleigh at 7 p.m. to conduct my interview, even her handlers were incoherent. Car services were sent and rebuffed.

“Even Aliana departed, but Lindsay wouldn’t end the party … it was like watching the lights come on at a nightclub after-hours — not pretty.”

“I never got my interview,” Powers wrote. “My associates and I were exhausted from the constant demands, drama, outbursts, cancellations and tsoris from the Lohan clique.” SOURCE

So basically, the “Too Long; Didn’t Read” version of this: “DRAMA BOOZE DRAMA BOOZE DIVA BOOZE METH COKE METH COKE BOOZE PUKE.” Who would have thought that treating the alcoholic drug addict with back-breaking subservience would have resulted in her acting like an ego-maniacal bitch actively trying to drink and drug herself into an early grave?

Lindsay Lohan