Lindsay Lohan as Linda Lovelace is a no go!

Lindsay Lohan as Linda Lovelace is a no go!

And just like that, the final nail in the booze and cocaine-soaked coffin of Lindsay Lohan‘s career has been hammered in, now that Lindsay has officially been shitcanned from the Linda Lovelace biopic, Inferno. Instead, Malin Akerman is taking over the role, because if her performance in Watchmen taught us anything, it’s that she’s very good at making everyone feel uncomfortable watching her have sex.

Required to remain in rehab until January for court-ordered substance-abuse treatment, Lindsay Lohan has parted ways professionally with Inferno director Matthew Wilder, who championed the actress in recent weeks but found it “impossible” to move forward on his already delayed production schedule with her as his leading lady. SOURCE

Yeah, I bet Lindsay must be absolutely devastated that she can’t play the emotionally-crippled pornstar. What a bummer. Until of course you realize that the script was a Hollywood punchline and the only star they could line-up for the shoot was a pre-rehab Lindsay, which is irrefutable proof that this movie is going to suck harder than its subject material.