WHEN MUSIC POPS, WE TURN IT UP

People want to see Kristen Stewart dead!

People want to see Kristen Stewart dead!
Kristen Stewart

When dealing with teenagers, it’s important to remember that the vast majority of them are idiots. It also helps to remember that Twi-hard teenagers are even bigger idiots. So of course, after Kristen Stewart publicly admitted that she cheated on Robert Pattinson, Twitter immediately blew up with death threats and suicide wishes aimed at Kristen because she broke Rob’s vaguely pretty, sparkly heart. Jezebel reports:

In this case, the tweens have chosen Rob. He was the one who was cheated on and, besides, it’s Team Edward that’s printed across the asses of their underwear and not Team Bella. They are angry, they are dismayed, they are betrayed and, as is their tween way, they have taken to Twitter to say some seriously stupid shit. Some used their Twitter accounts to issue explicit death threats. Others didn’t want the blood on their own hands, but didn’t mind the idea of blood on their consciences. They simply planted the idea that Kristen, who is only 22 years old and made a mistake that she’s no doubt already paying for, should commit suicide. How Shakespearean of them.

Look, I’m by no means a proponent of cheating, but death seems like a bit of a harsh punishment for cheating on your boyfriend. Then again, I am an old jaded a-hole who doesn’t understand how precious meaningful a teenager’s love for Edward Cullen is, even though he is fictitious, and they don’t even personally know the guy who plays him. I’m sure that imaginary relationship would have ended well for everyone involved.

Kristen Stewart