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Kim and Kanye try to explain the name ‘North West’

Kim and Kanye try to explain the name ‘North West’
June 24, 2013 JEREMY FEIST

So Kanye West and Kim Kardashian named their baby girl North West, because … well, if you can score some cheap publicity using a pun, you might as well take it, right? Well, TMZ is reporting that Kanye is trying to explain why they would name their kid using navigational-based humor, and surprisingly, the answer isn’t “Because the name ‘I Was Conceived For Publicity West-Kardashian’ wouldn’t fit on the birth certificate” …

Sources close to K & K tell TMZ … they chose the name North because they see it as a metaphor for “up”, telling friends, “What’s North of North? Nothing.” Translation … nothing better. We’re told the duo believes baby North is their highest point together as a couple … the pinnacle of the relationship … and they consider her their “North Star.”

Wait, what?! That’s not how you name your baby! That’s how you name your hokey Tumblr page where you post crappy Instagrams captioned with vaguely philosophical quotes! You clumsy pair of douchebags, if you had to raise an egg together like a couple of middle-schoolers, you’d name it “Inner Beauty” and your teacher would give you an F just to spite you.

Jeremy Feist is an (ahem) entertainer from Toronto, Canada. He writes, acts, and performs on stage, and has been a writer for Popbytes for almost three years now. He lives in Toronto with his boyfriend, his incredibly dumb but cute puppy, and his immortal cat.