Ladies and gentlemen, break out your tiniest violins: Khloé Kardashian lost her $850,000 engagement ring from Lamar Odom. You know; the one she got for her fake marriage she staged for her fake reality show? Yeah, that one. Yeah, I feel just soooooo fucking sorry for her too. On the plus side, looks like Lamar gets anal tonight!
As she rifles through her jewelry box, her older sis Kim tries to calm her down. “It’s got to be here somewhere!” Kim, 29, reassures her. Khloé, 26, is afraid to tell her husband Lamar Odom because he is already stressed out because it is playoff seasons. SOURCE
Hypothetical pop quiz! If Khloé charges $5 for a handy outside in the alley way of an Applebee’s, and charges an extra $5 to pretend she’s actually She-Hulk while she does it, how many guys does she have to jerk off before she can repay Lamar for the engagement ring she got for her fake wedding? Remember to show all your work.