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WHEN MUSIC POPS, WE TURN IT UP

Wanna see Kanye West’s digital penis?

Wanna see Kanye West’s digital penis?
July 9, 2013 JEREMY FEIST

Kanye West

(Don’t answer that …) So apparently, Kanye West posted the music video for his new single, “BLKKK SKKKN HEAD,” on his website last night only to remove it almost immediately afterwards for absolutely no reason whatsoever. Somewhere out there, Kris Jenner is smiling and nodding. “The famewhore is strong in this one,” she says, pouring herself another bowl of orphan bones.

Anyway, two things immediately spring from this horrible mess: First off, the entire video is just a bad CGI rendition of a naked Kanye West dancing awkwardly while swinging around a his 3D penis. Why? I don’t know. I think this is supposed to be an artistic statement, but it’s somewhat undercut by the fact that naked CGI Kanye has the grace and mobility of that dancing baby GIF from Ally McBeal. Second, as a lot of people pointed out, the main characters of 300 were Spartans. Seriously, the most memorable line from that movie was literally a reminder as to the setting of the entire movie. Are you telling me that Kanye can’t even remember that? Yeezus H.

Jeremy Feist is an (ahem) entertainer from Toronto, Canada. He writes, acts, and performs on stage, and has been a writer for Popbytes for almost three years now. He lives in Toronto with his boyfriend, his incredibly dumb but cute puppy, and his immortal cat.