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Justin Bieber is auctioning off a snake?!

Justin Bieber is auctioning off a snake?!
November 11, 2011 JEREMY FEIST
Justin Bieber

Oh. Hells. Naw. Look, I’ve been going easy on Justin Bieber with the whole baby daddy thing, mostly because I’m a firm believer in going after bullshit rather than going after fame. That being said, some of you might remember that Justin brought a small snake to the MTV VMAs because using live animals as fashion accessories is super trendy. Anyway, I’m guessing he realized that snakes require more work to take care of than a bracelet, so he’s auctioning it off now, because living beings are jewelry now. Celebuzz reports:

Despite his love for his slithering half-pet/half-fashion accessory friend, Justin is auctioning off his Johnson to raise money for charity. Charitybuzz is hosting an auction in which the highest bidder will get to keep the snake, with all the proceeds going to Justin’s favorite non-profit organization, Pencils of Promise. The minimum next bid for Johnson is a whopping $2,000, and the auction doesn’t even end until November 29!

What the hell? I don’t give a shit if it’s for charity; you’re auctioning off live reptiles here. LIVE. REPTILES. It’s like he sat down one day and thought “Hmmm … I want to do something irresponsible, but I also want it to be morally reprehensible to boot. Oh hey, why is my bracelet trying to escape?” Living beings are not fashion statements, and you’re an asshole for believing they are and for promoting that message.

Justin Bieber