Justin Bieber wants a mustache!

Justin Bieber

Because clearly getting rid of his weird, Lego hair wasn’t a big and hilarious enough of a “FUCK YOU” to all his fans, Justin Bieber has decided to try and grow a mustache, except that this is Bieber we’re talking about, so chances are he’ll grow a D-Cup before he sees his first big-boy hairs.

He lost 80,000 Twitter fans when he cut his trademark bangs and now Justin Bieber, 17, is set to shake up his hair situation again. “im not shaving for a month so you all can see my mustache,” he wrote on his Twitter page Saturday. “i’m pumped.” SOURCE

It doesn’t really surprise me that Justin wants a mustache, I’m just more surprised that he doesn’t want one that’s already attached to a San Francisco rentboy. Seriously, I don’t get it: How do they grow such thick, luxurious, silky-smooth mustaches? Oh, gay whores, teach me your grooming secrets …

Justin Bieber

About JEREMY FEIST 5002 Articles
Jeremy Feist is an (ahem) entertainer from Toronto, Canada. He writes, acts, and performs on stage, and has been a writer for Popbytes for almost three years now. He lives in Toronto with his boyfriend, his incredibly dumb but cute puppy, and his immortal cat.