Justin Bieber’s battery / spitting case is being taken seriously

Justin Bieber’s battery / spitting case is being taken seriously
March 28, 2013 JEREMY FEIST

Justin Bieber

Granted, most of what I know about the California legal system has so far come from watching Lindsay Lohan bend it over her knee and wail on it, even though she’s broke and dumber than narwhal. So when I heard that Justin Bieber‘s battery/spitting case is being taken seriously by the D.A., I just assumed what they really meant was “we’re going to send him to bed for the night without any dessert. Okay, fine, one scoop of ice cream. But not chocolate! Okay chocolate. Two scoops of chocolate.” TMZ reports …

We’re told when the L.A. County Sheriff’s Dept. concludes its investigation … the case WILL be referred to the D.A. for review and possible prosecution. TMZ broke the story … one of Bieber’s neighbors claims the singer was tearing through their Calabasas community Tuesday at speeds approaching 100 mph, and when the neighbor confronted Bieber he allegedly spit in the guy’s face and threatened to kill him. Several prosecutors in the D.A.’s Office tell TMZ … spitting crimes are taken seriously for two reasons — first, it’s considered an extremely aggressive and “disgusting act,” and second, it poses potentially serious health concerns.

On one hand, yes, Justin is a little shit who has no regard for other people’s health and safety as long as he can take his shiny little car and go vroom vroom down a residential street at 100 MPH, so if they want to throw the book at him, I’m totally on board with this one. On the other hand, he’s rich, young, and famous in L.A. so chances are he’ll skate by with some half-assed community service.

Jeremy Feist is an (ahem) entertainer from Toronto, Canada. He writes, acts, and performs on stage, and has been a writer for Popbytes for almost three years now. He lives in Toronto with his boyfriend, his incredibly dumb but cute puppy, and his immortal cat.