What, did you think the adaptation of 50 Shades of Grey wouldn’t be a colossal celluloid turd smoothie? HA! No, no this movie will suck because it’s based on a book that also sucks. And also because Justin Bieber has been offered a role in the movie. You know, just in case you weren’t entirely convinced that the people behind this book/movie know about as much about sex as a Teletubby. From HuffPo …
Justin then let slip to Jonathan: “They actually want me to be in the movie!”, resulting in mass hysteria from the fans in the audience. While Justin’s fans may be excited at the thought of him appearing in the kinky flick, his girlfriend Selena Gomez might have ideas about who should be appearing alongside him in the role Anastasia Steele.
When reached for comment, a parody of Bret Easton Ellis had this to say:
“Matthew Bomer would be too gay for this movie, but Justin Bieber? Now that’s some heterosexuality! Hey, remember when I wrote one good thing twenty years ago and coasted on that ever since? Please remember that. Otherwise, I’m irrelevant.”