Justin Bieber’s rider: No talking or Selena Gomez music

Justin Bieber’s rider: No talking or Selena Gomez music
June 30, 2013 JEREMY FEIST

Selena Gomez and Justin Bieber

Earlier today I saw a story about how Justin Bieber and Selena Gomez were reportedly back on, because teenagers are idiots when it comes to relationships. I’ve seen praying mantises who’ve had more stable relationships. Well, if they’re back on, chances are it won’t last for much longer: In a photo shoot rider obtained by TMZ, Justin apparently demanded that no “Selena music” be played on set. So either they’re not gonna last much longer, or Justin just doesn’t like deceased Latin pop musicians.

TMZ has obtained a rider from a Bieber photo shoot earlier this month, and other restrictions include NO cell phones and NO autographs whatsoever … which are actually pretty common demands. But Bieber also has a laundry list of food demands on set — including herbal teas, a deli platter, a veggie platter, a large pack of Swedish Fish, Ritz Bits Peanut Butter Sandwiches, Ritz Bitz Cheese Sandwiches, and 2 large packs of Haribo cola gummies.

Munchies much?

Bieber also must have a serious sweating problem — because he asks for several packs of white undershirts, tanks and socks as well. Weird. Then of course, there’s the required boombox with an iPhone 5 connector … for tunes. Just remember: “No Selena Music on set.”

Honestly, I’m just amazed that Justin didn’t include “saggy-ass diaper pants” and “monkey sacrifices” on his rider. I mean … progress I suppose? But still, no Selena music sounds like the kind of mature decision making that will lead to years of moderation and happiness in his li- Oh, yeah, this is the kid with the gaudy leopard-print car. Oh no. He’s going to crash and burn like a grenade piloting a kamikaze plane.

Jeremy Feist is an (ahem) entertainer from Toronto, Canada. He writes, acts, and performs on stage, and has been a writer for Popbytes for almost three years now. He lives in Toronto with his boyfriend, his incredibly dumb but cute puppy, and his immortal cat.