Good news, absolutely no one! If you have completely lost the will to live, or you’re just looking to defy the part of your brain that keeps you from doing things that can and will kill you (“Man, that electrical outlet looks delicious. Let’s stick a fork in it!”), you can now stay in the Jersey Shore house for $3,500 a night. So while you can’t put a price on good pussy, you can put a price tag on the various STIs you will inevitably catch by living in the same space where Snooki once roamed.
The Seaside Heights, N.J., home made famous by MTV’s outrageous Jersey Shore reality show is up for rent— for a cool $3,500 per night, reports NJ.com. Here’s the details: The hot tub is reportedly gone but most everything else, including the famous duck phone, is still intact. “This is a once in a lifetime opportunity to have your Graduation, Sweet Sixteen, Bachelor or Birthday party in one of the hottest properties on the East Coast!” the Seaside Realty listing reads. It also says: “All rentals are subject to a minimum damage security deposit of $1,000. Please, inquire with us if you need help finding local caterers, security, DJ’s, etc.” SOURCE
Yup, so basically a completely mediocre beach-house that no one would normally really care about now costs $3,500 a night because a slutty leprechaun once lived there on a shitty reality TV show. You know, most people would quarantine the house to avoid spreading the thousands upon thousands of diseases that you can catch from simply breathing the air in there, but I guess renting it out to anyone with some cash works too. Not like that’s a war crime or anything.