J.K. Rowling was pretending to be an ex-military man?

J.K. Rowling was pretending to be an ex-military man?
July 15, 2013 JEREMY FEIST

I’m pretty sure author J.K. Rowling is a billionaire at this point and can sit back and watch as helicopters dump giant buckets of money into her mansion’s courtyard at this point, so she doesn’t really even have to try anymore. But Rowling is nothing if not brilliant and industrious, so according to the New York Daily News, she wrote a crime novel under the identity of an ex-military man and scored herself yet another critically-acclaimed best-seller, all without using the name that made her famous. Why? Because she’s J.K. Rowling, that’s why!

LONDON — An ex-military man tries his hand at writing, publishes a debut detective novel, and wins critical acclaim. But here’s the twist in the tale: The true identity of the author is none other than “Harry Potter” creator J.K. Rowling. It’s impressive literary wizardry by Rowling, who said she relished the freedom of writing “The Cuckoo’s Calling” under her pseudonym, Robert Galbraith.

“I hoped to keep this secret a little longer because being Robert Galbraith has been such a liberating experience,” she said in a statement released by her publicist on Sunday. “It has been wonderful to publish without hype or expectation, and pure pleasure to get feedback from publishers and readers under a different name.”

So basically, J.K. wrote rich, detailed books that got an entire generation of kids to read, decided to prove to herself and others how talented she was, so she ditched her identity and fame and wrote yet another critically-acclaimed book just to show what a skilled writer she is. To put how rare a display of raw, utter artistic talent this is, Kris Jenner pretended to use her daughter’s baby to pull in ratings for her talk show. I’m not saying J.K. is a far better person than Kris, but oh wait, yes I am. This analogy might be difficult for her to understand, but Kris is chlamydia compared to Rowling.

Robert Galbraith "The Cuckoo's Calling"

Jeremy Feist is an (ahem) entertainer from Toronto, Canada. He writes, acts, and performs on stage, and has been a writer for Popbytes for almost three years now. He lives in Toronto with his boyfriend, his incredibly dumb but cute puppy, and his immortal cat.