I am thankful for Tila Tequila! (But not really)

Are you worried that you’re going to overeat today at Thanksgiving? Well have I got the cure for you! Tila Tequila made out with d-list fatherfucker Kate Major at her birthday party, which was attended by Michael Lohan and one of Tiger Woods‘ mistresses. My God, it’s like a who’s who of people you’ll soon see on Dancing With The Stars! Or the free clinic.

Tabloid writer Kate Major celebrated her birthday with a smooch from the beautiful Tila Tequila at West Hollywood’s House of Blues Tuesday night. Also in attendance at the bash was the always delightful Michael Lohan, who told Celebuzz he hadn’t been to the House of Blues since Lindsay Lohan was there for a Freaky Friday event years ago, as well as Tiger Woods’ mistress Joslyn James, a porn star who was celebrating her 33rd birthday and her nomination for an AVN award. SOURCE

Since it’s Thanksgiving, I’d like to give thanks for Tila Tequila … you crazy fucking self-centered bitch. I would like to give thanks for your ass-backwards moral compass and your complete lack of self-awareness. Thank you for making yourself such an easy target by being just an awful, awful human being. Thank you Tila Tequila; you have single-handedly paid for my rent.

About JEREMY FEIST 5002 Articles
Jeremy Feist is an (ahem) entertainer from Toronto, Canada. He writes, acts, and performs on stage, and has been a writer for Popbytes for almost three years now. He lives in Toronto with his boyfriend, his incredibly dumb but cute puppy, and his immortal cat.