Quantcast
WHEN MUSIC POPS, WE TURN IT UP

Here comes the Kardashian tell-all book!

Here comes the Kardashian tell-all book!
December 29, 2011 JEREMY FEIST
The Kardashians

We all knew it was only a matter of time before a spurned nanny came forward with a tell-all book about the Kardashians, and now that the entire world is tuned into the fact that Kim Kardashian is a lying opportunist incapable of “that emotion you humans call love” (Kim’s word’s, right before she put a cigarette out on a baby’s still-open fontanelle) it looks like one of the family’s old nannies is shopping around a tell-all book about the family, according to TMZ.

Sources tell us … the woman behind the book, Pam Behan, served as a nanny, personal assistant and cook for Bruce and Kris Jenner for years … and spent all sorts of time with the Kardashian girls AND the Jenner boys, Brody and Brandon. We’re told … in the book, Pam makes it clear — she couldn’t stand Bruce’s sons … calling the two kids, “extremely spoiled and disrespectful.” In the book, we’re told Pam also claims she almost lost her job after slapping Brandon one day. As for the Kardashians — we’re told Pam describes her relationship with Kris as a “love/hate” thing … but she seems fond of Bruce, claiming he helped her avoid prosecution when she was busted for DUI a while back. We’re told Pam also promises to reveal some “intimate details” about Kourtney and Kim — surprising, because we’re told the girls were very fond of her.

Wait wait wait … your big exposé is on Bruce’s sons no one really cares about? Oh come on! If you’re going to write about the Kardashians, you go after Kim. Everyone in the literary world knows you have to harpoon the giant white whale. It was the whole point of Moby Dick! Unless of course I completely misread that one … *checks book again* Ha ha! Ishmael‘s a funny name.

The Kardashians