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WHEN MUSIC POPS, WE TURN IT UP

Gosh, Justin Bieber is quite the lady’s man, huh?

Gosh, Justin Bieber is quite the lady’s man, huh?
December 17, 2013 JEREMY FEIST

Justin Bieber

You know, for the longest time, I didn’t get the raw, sexual appeal of Justin Bieber. I looked down on Beliebers, saying that they were deifying a mediocre singer of average aesthetic because they were easily swayed little girls who didn’t know better. But now, after watching Justin get roasted by Chris D’Elia at The Laugh Factory, only to defend himself by saying he “f*cks bitches”? I get it now! I totally get it! Man, the thought of having eight seconds of disappointing sex with Justin, only to have him turn around and say he “f*cks bitches”? My gawd, I’m practically in a puddle with anticipation. I get it. I totally get it now. He’s my soul mate. Ours shall be a spring wedding!

PHOTO | INSTAGRAM

Jeremy Feist is an (ahem) entertainer from Toronto, Canada. He writes, acts, and performs on stage, and has been a writer for Popbytes for almost three years now. He lives in Toronto with his boyfriend, his incredibly dumb but cute puppy, and his immortal cat.