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Oh, Christ Pratt … there’s just more of you to love!

Oh, Christ Pratt … there’s just more of you to love!
August 29, 2011 JEREMY FEIST
Chris Pratt

If you’re not watching the INCREDIBLE Parks & Recreation by now, then you are probably just terrible. Anyway, Chris Pratt, who plays lovably doofy and adorably scruffy Andy Dwyer, is co-starring in Brad Pitt‘s Moneyball. In a chat with Huffington Post, Chris revealed he almost didn’t get the role because he was … too fat. That’s right, it works both ways. Yay, Hollywood! You’re equally awful to everyone!

“My agent called me and said, ‘Chris, they really thought you were good, but they think you’re too fat,'” Prat remembered. “I was like, ‘F*ck, really? That sucks. OK, well, I can lose weight. Did you tell them I could lose weight?’ ‘Yeah, we told them. They haven’t offered it to anyone else. There’s no guarantee, but …’ … It was another three months before I found out I got the role, but in that three months I think I dropped 30 pounds. I was bound and determined to become Scott Hatteberg whether they cast me or not.”

Awww, it’s okay Chris Pratt. We all still love you. Because you’re funny! And because you’re kind of scruffy, like an adorable puppy. Except you’re a grown man and you’re also kinda sexy. You’re like in the middle between being adorable and sexy. Sexadorable? Yeah, let’s go with that. Either way, you’re still hot no matter how much you weigh. But not as hot as Ron Fucking Swanson. Because, well, MUSTACHE RIDE. That’s why.

Chris Pratt