Chris Brown just did a brand-new interview with The Guardian, which is currently spreading like a wild fire because (A) it turns out, he’s still a pretty difficult subject to interview, and (B) he claims he lost his virginity at the age of eight, except it turns out I’m pretty sure it’s technically sexual abuse because eight years old. He was eight years old when it happened.
He lost his virginity when he was eight years old, to a local girl who was 14 or 15. Seriously? “Yeah, really. Uh-huh.” He grins and chuckles. “It’s different in the country.” Brown grew up with a great gang of boy cousins, and they watched so much porn that he was raring to go. “By that point, we were already kind of like hot to trot, you know what I’m saying? Like, girls, we weren’t afraid to talk to them; I wasn’t afraid. So, at eight, being able to do it, it kind of preps you for the long run, so you can be a beast at it. You can be the best at it.” (Now 24, he doesn’t want to say how many women he’s slept with: “But you know how Prince had a lot of girls back in the day? Prince was, like, the guy. I’m just that, today. But most women won’t have any complaints if they’ve been with me. They can’t really complain. It’s all good.”)
OH MY GOD. No, really, that wasn’t sex. If a 14-year-old has sex with an eight-year-old, that’s sexual abuse. Everyone else realizes that, right? I think someone might want to sit Chris down and very gently explain to him that a teenager, who clearly should have known better, took advantage of him at an age when he absolutely did not know what was happening and had no means of defending himself.