I have good news and bad news. Well, specifically, I have good news for people who appreciate good television and bad news for the staff of Two And A Half Men. It turns out, not only is being a decent person a part of Charlie Sheen‘s contract, but he’s now telling Warner Brothers that if they don’t let him do as much coke and booze and woman-beating as he wants, he won’t come back to the show and they’ll be forced to shut down production.
Our sources say if Charlie doesn’t come back, his role will absolutely not be re-cast and Warner Bros. would end production immediately. As TMZ has been reporting, there’s a lot of conflict between Charlie on the one side and Warner Bros., CBS and creator Chuck Lorre on the other. Charlie says he wants to return to work but is beyond pissed that Warner Bros. has 86’d 4 of the last 8 scheduled episodes this season. SOURCE
I’m honestly not sure how many times I have to rephrase ‘Stop paying a woman-shooting, drug abusing sociopath two million bucks a week’ before anyone actually listens to me, but fuck it, just let Charlie stay in a mansion made entirely of crystal meth, fill it with loads of prostitutes and set it on fire. That sounds bad, but let’s face it: it will happen before the end of the month.