WHEN MUSIC POPS, WE TURN IT UP
WHEN MUSIC POPS, WE TURN IT UP

Box Office: ‘The Amazing Spider-Man’ is tops!

Box Office: ‘The Amazing Spider-Man’ is tops!

The Amazing Spider-Man

The Amazing Spider-Man

  • For a movie that was made solely for the purpose of maintaining the film rights to Spider-Man, Sony’s The Amazing Spider-Man is raking in some pretty insane amounts of cash. The movie has done some pretty bonkers numbers over seas, and in the U.S. it’s taken in $65 Million over the weekend, raising it’s total to an impressive $140 Million. If I had to guess why audiences so thoroughly embraced it: No emo Tobey Maguire doing some bullshit jazz dance while every other character talked about their feelings for two hours. Any movie that is not that is worth my money.
  • Ted, the latest from Seth MacFarlane’s patented “Idiot man-child + Hot doting girlfriend + Best friend who happens to be a talking thing-that-doesn’t-talk”, continues to print money, as does everything he makes because goddammit we will shovel that into our eyeholes like it’s liquid gold. Guys everywhere plunked another $32.6 Million on it, which means we can all look forward to Ken, about a sentient Ken doll who acts like a rowdy sports fan.
  • Proving once and for all that bows and arrows are the new greatest weapon ever (sorry chainsaw, you had a good run …) Brave took in another $20 Million over the weekend, inspiring people to take up archery before realizing that it’s actually way harder than it looks and then throwing into the “complex art turned cultural fad” pile, alongside the whips from their 50 Shades of Grey phase.
  • Despite seeing posters for this movie all over Toronto (seriously, they’re on every single bus) I have no idea what Savages is about. Although if I had to guess? Luchadores trying to seduce male masseuses. Anyway, the movie earned $16 Million over the weekend, which I guess means no one else knows what it’s about either.
  • Want to know how big of a draw male celebrity peen is? In it’s second weekend, Magic Mike has already earned ten times its budget at the domestic box office. That’s none too shabby. It brought in another $15.6 Million this weekend, as women and gay men everywhere tried to figure out how to pronounce Joe Manganiello’s name. How else am I supposed to shout his name during sex?