Box Office: Apes beat out Transformers

Dawn of the Planet of the Apes

Dawn of the Planet of the Apes

  • True story: The other day, I was on a pad thai binge after a day of work, and I’m pretty sure I ate enough to fill a bucket. Literally a bucket of pad thai. I was bloated, aching, and supremely ashamed of myself for not being able to recognize my own personal limitations, and as soon as I got home I hate half a pint of Ben & Jerry’s Coffee Toffee Crunch. I guess what I’m trying to say is that, according to BoxOfficeMojo, Dawn of the Planet of the Apes is the Coffee Toffee Crunch of this weekend’s box office, taking in $73 Million even after America spent the past few weeks gorging themselves on a bucket of …
  • Transfomers: Age of Extinction, which will be the bucket of pad thai in my overly drawn-out metaphor. Anyway, it took in another $16.5 Million, which just proves that with enough willpower (or lack thereof) you can always down just a few more curried noodles.
  • I’m not sure what delicious food Tammy would be in all of this, so … I don’t know. Maybe a really good slice of pizza you buy at like 12:30 in the morning after a long night at The Eagle, and also it comes with a side of creamy garlic dipping sauce? Because pizza without creamy garlic dipping sauce is a f*cking tragedy? Anyway, it made $12.9 Million, and has almost tripled its budget over the span of two weekends.
  • Oh, and 22 Jump Street has also tripled its budget after almost five weeks, taking in $6.7 Million. I guess they would be Chipotle? Something immensely popular that’s actually popular for a reason?
  • And finally, How To Train Your Dragon 2. We actually saw it last week, and it was really good. Honestly, it’s a shame more people didn’t go see it, because it was so awesome. This would be like the quiet, hidden little eatery that not many people go to that somehow makes a burger so sumptuous and delicious it would make baby ducks cry rainbow tears.
About JEREMY FEIST 5002 Articles
Jeremy Feist is an (ahem) entertainer from Toronto, Canada. He writes, acts, and performs on stage, and has been a writer for Popbytes for almost three years now. He lives in Toronto with his boyfriend, his incredibly dumb but cute puppy, and his immortal cat.