Whenever a major disaster happens, the first thing anyone tries to do is find someone to take responsibility for it. Such is the case with Kim Kardashian‘s shitty new single Jam (Turn It Up), which is pretty much the equivalent of ear-homicide. Anyway, the good news is we’ve finally found out who’s to blame for convincing Kim to release this turd: Ciara. BURN THE WITCH.
“I’m so shy,” Kardashian admits when Ciara passes along the message that record producer The-Dream was anxious to work with her. “I’d be so nervous to get into a studio and sing in front of other people, especially The-Dream.” Ciara wonders what Kardashian has to lose. “It’s about having a fun experience,” the singer says. “At the end of the day, it’s about you being able to express yourself in that world and play with it. Go in there and try it, see if you like it. Go for it! Why not?” SOURCE
No Ciara, no. Music, at least pop music anyway, is not about expressing yourself. Pop music is about making songs that don’t make people envy the deaf. They’re also about not making everyone hate the Kardashians more than we already do, although at this point unless they baked everyone in the world a plate of ‘I’m Sorry’ cookies, everyone would still think they’re just two whores and a wookie.